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Find Your Links and Feel Good
image from upup creative
On the internet, we are accustomed to seeing links everywhere. We often click them to go further into a topic. By nature, we’re curious — so… we click the links, which are like sealed boxes, and experience instant satisfaction. When we click on a bad web link, we can easily click back and voila problem solved. However, the links within ourselves are not underlined and color coded. We can’t see them — so when we get stuck, it can be difficult to pinpoint where the link exists.
Before I typed this blog post, I wrote it on a piece of paper with a pen. I can’t think when I type. I’ve always seen this as a huge waste of time since writing long papers by hand can take a ton of time! I’ve been writing a lot recently and have noticed my hand gets tired after awhile and I stop writing for a few moments to let my hand rest. And in those few moments, I often come up with fresh ideas or the missing component of my argument. Just a few moments, when I rest my hand, may be a critical component of my writing process. I mention this little “aha” moment because when we feel stuck or uncomfortable (no link in sight), it is often due to something that seems very minor, such as sitting in one direction versus another direction or using a pen versus a keyboard. When we think in a logical, structured way, we can easily miss the important details. To recognize these little details, we must tap into our right-brain’s thinking style. Until recently, I neglected to engage my right-brain’s treasury. Exploring my creative side has given me more tools to examine life from different perspectives.
Bridging the gap between left-brain thinking and right-brain thinking, Julie Green has created “Feel Good Lists.” Don’t be fooled by the name, it is much more than a list. It is a powerful tool for self-change.
How often do your “regular” to-do list items trump your personal items?
Often, we (myself included) focus little on ourselves and then when we do we feel guilty that we didn’t complete items two and three on our “regular” to-do list. Rationally, it doesn’t make sense. Saying, “I feel good today,” should be a high priority in our lives. It sounds easy enough so why aren’t we doing it?
Because it’s not easy.
We’ve heard it a million times: action – action – action. We need to take action in order to change. And that is 100% true.
However, it’s in this leap from “thought” to “action” that we often get lost.
Why? Well, our webmaster has quit and our links are gone. Yikes. We need to create the links. This requires our logical left-brain and creative right-brain to work together.
Thought: “I want to feel good.”
That’s a pretty lofty goal so where do we even start? We need to define the sub-goals. In order to define your sub-goals, you have to really think about the specifics and ask yourself, “What do I need to do so that I can feel good?” For example, you may create three sub-goals, such as: practice yoga, express gratitude on a regular basis, spend more time with family.
Now, you have established specific goals to “feel good.”
And that’s where the “feel good lists” come in. Utilizing the unique structure of the feel good lists, you can tailor your list to your specific goals. You establish actions to do on a daily and/or weekly basis to help you along the way. Going through the thought process of establishing feasible actions can lead to some wonderful soul-searching and new creative outlets. On most occasions, you’ll have to dig deep to find the all-important link.
Establishing a list of “feel good” items creates structure (making your left-brain very happy!) and accountability. Through these two key ingredients, structure and accountability, your goal remains in focus.
So now what? I believe the next step should always be “clear” and “simple” — note my username: clrsimple [my initials: clr]
Below are a few clear and simple ideas.
Feel Good this Weekend!!
Carolyn
• • •
Simplify101 Workshop — any of the workshops will help you through the thought process and taking action!
• • •
Think.
- Tap into your right-brain.
- Think creatively about what you want and what steps you need to take.
- Check out 100 ideas from Keri Smith
Trial and Error. You don’t need a perfect action plan. You just need to take action. Re-evaluate along the way and tweak your method as needed.
Actively look for connections — you never know when the “aha” link is going to occur — often during the most unexpected times.
Related "ripples" you might enjoy:
- Where do you feel most safe?
- The Courage to Continue: 26 Quotes to Help You Regain Confidence When You Feel Defeated
- Learning As You Go and The Itty Bitty Check-In List
- How to Take Action on a Daunting Project
This entry was posted on Friday, February 6th, 2009 at 9:57 pm and is filed under Tips + Techniques. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
8 Responses to “Find Your Links and Feel Good”
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carolyn,
this is such a wonderful post. i like how you take your analytical eye to the feelgood list. i created it because i was in the midst of personal crisis and needed to find creative solutions to my so-called problems. i never even really gave it much left-brain thought… never really sat down and thought about how or why i was making a list. i just needed one.
but now that you’ve got me thinking more analytically about it, i think that what works about a list geared towards feeling good is exactly what you highlight: making the list forces you to be thoughtful about what you really need in your life; using it allows you to feel a strong sense of accomplishment without thinking at all about chores done and errands completed and projects tackled.
i read a book once about change and about how it requires six steps (which i am trying to bring up from the deepest depths of my memory here but i can only think of four):
contemplation
planning / preparation
action
maintenance
this little list i made for myself when i was severely depressed after the birth of my first child wraps all of those four steps into one: i had to brainstorm “what do i really need in my life to feel content?”; i had to make the list; i had to start using it; i had to keep using it.
the book (i think it was by a man named prochaska and a second author i cannot remember) also emphasized reward, and for me that was the best thing about this list: seeing everything small i had accomplished (taking a shower!) was a strong reinforcing reward in itself. i didn’t need to buy myself a present as a reward because my personal satisfaction was reward in itself, and the list was helping me be nice to myself in small ways all the time instead of only when i had accomplished something.
whew. that was a long comment. anyway, thanks so much for helping me think this all through.
i hope you love your list.
julie
In the book the last stage wasn’t relapse but something like “completion” or something. I can’t remember. But yes, those are the authors. The book I read was called Changing For Good.
I honestly, truly am going to treat myself to this Up Up Creative’s list as a celebration for myself! They’re gorgeous & I love how they’re customizable.
I also use a Feel Good List, and keep a running one as a permanent page on my blog. I go to it often when I need “me” time, or need to find a celebration. I’d love for you to peruse mine (http://is.gd/jl7p), but I encourage everyone to make their own personal one for what constitutes a celebration for THEM!
Great post, Carolyn (or clrsimple!)
Twitter: carolynr
says:
… Julie, thank you so much for the information. I like completion better than relapse! Changing for Good sounds like a great book.
… Michelle, I love your list! Your blog is just incredible. It is filled with so much great information. I am very addicted and must catch up on reading all of the posts that I’ve missed prior to “meeting” you!!!
Aw, thanks Carolyn! I can’t tell you how much it means to have you as a fan of my blog! It really keeps me going. You’re awesome!
[...] Find Your Links and Feel Good « a beautiful ripple effect [...]
Twitter: carolynr
says:
I am so happy that you liked the post! I did a bit of searching and think I found the Prochaska and DiClemente’s Stages of Change that you are referencing.
1. Pre-Contemplation
2. Contemplation
3. Preparation
4. Action
5. Maintenance
6. Relapse ** (not sure I agree with this last item — of course when changing one may lapse from time to time, but that doesn’t necessarily mean relapse)
Here is a link to an overview of the stages: http://www.cellinteractive.com/ucla/physcian_ed/stages_change.html
I completely agree that rewards are so important. That is what I love about the list — you feel rewarded when you do something for yourself — a somewhat foreign concept!!
Twitter: carolynr
says:
I found the book on Amazon Julie — it looks really interesting.
http://www.amazon.com/Changing-Good-Revolutionary-Overcoming-Positively/dp/038072572X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1235510684&sr=1-1
Changing for Good: A Revolutionary Six-Stage Program for Overcoming Bad Habits and Moving Your Life Positively Forward (James O. Prochaska, John Norcross, Carlo DiClemente)