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How to Talk Your Way to Greater Productivity
“It is not discipline, willpower, or pressure from others that facilitates adherence to a challenging course of action. Rather, it is the freedom to choose among alternatives, the personal commitment to a mission, and the willingness to take responsibility for the consequences of our decisions that steels the will and emboldens the spirit.” -Neil Fiore
It’s no secret that we love to talk to ourselves, more commonly known as “self-talk.” Our self-talk can communicate a message of productivity (commitment to action) or a message of procrastination (resistance to action). We have the power to recognize different messages and choose which we prefer to utilize. Self-talk typically occurs subconsciously, however, which makes us often ignore limiting or self-defeating language much more easily. But by doing that, you remain powerless over the impact of subliminal messages, which reaches far beyond our subconscious.
Overview: Notice, Rephrase, and Commit to Action
First, notice counterproductive vs. productive self-talk.
Second, rephrase your counterproductive self-talk by utilizing more effective language.
Third, translate your knowledge into the context of change. Focus on utilizing effective self-talk to create positive behavioral changes, thereby increasing your commitment to action and avoiding the paralysis of procrastination.
Notice How You Talk To Yourself: Recognize Counterproductive Messages
When you talk to yourself in an authoritarian voice, you are subconsciously communicating a message of fear and resentment to both your mind and your body. Fear of course can be a great motivator, but to what end? And how much fear is too much fear? There is no clear threshold here. However, when you begin only reacting out of fear or procrastinating just due to fear, it’s time to change your voice. Below are a few examples of self-talk that can trigger a fear-based response.
- I have to…
- I should…
- I must finish…
- I must be perfect…
- I don’t have time to take a break.
- I need to finish this really important and HUGE project very soon/immediately.
- What am I forgetting to do?
- Why didn’t I start this task earlier?
- I’ll never finish this project.
- This project has to be done perfectly or else.
- What’s wrong with me?
- Why do I make so many mistakes?
- Why can’t I do just this one thing right?
- I have to finish everything.
Just typing these statements produced a tremendous sense of fear within me. I noticed that I began to type faster and felt a much greater resistance to the overall goal of this post. I got lost in my thoughts – and even began to think along the same lines as in “I need to write this post perfectly or else…” Then, I caught myself (thankfully). So I took a deep breathe, moved my fingers away from the keyboard, and focused on the big picture – my personal goal for the post. The paralysis dissolved and I was back in action.
Can you relate to any of the statements above? Try printing out this article or writing thoughts down on paper that you can relate to easily. This exercise will give you greater leverage and help in rephrasing these statements and moving forward.
Bottom Line: Notice your self-talk and how it makes you feel. Write down any statements that make you feel a sense of fear or worry. By simply recognizing specific thoughts, you are taking back control. The thoughts are no longer working subconsciously. You choose how to move forward rather than stalling due to fear.
Notice How You Talk To Yourself: Identify Productive Messages
Not everything we say is negative! Let’s take a few minutes to focus on the positive messages we give ourselves. These statements may also be working subconsciously, so I’ll start the exercise by providing a few examples. Read through them and notice how you feel as you do so. Do you feel a different response, a more positive feeling, than you did when reading through the counterproductive messages listed earlier?
- I choose to…
- When can I start?
- I can take one small step.
- I can be perfectly human.
- I must take time to play.
- I want to…
- I decide…
- I will…
It’s easy to get caught up in negative self-talk. We all know that such messages don’t communicate what we choose for ourselves; rather, they communicate a feeling of burden or powerlessness. There is no choice that is actually identified in our inner dialogue, and that is the essential element of productive self-talk. Productive language is all about choice – all about being in power and deciding what we want to do, regardless of our current circumstances. Yes, we are in situation B, so how do we want to begin? How do we choose to begin?
The goal is to start from a positive mindset, always shifting from “should” to “choose.”
Rephrase the self-talk of procrastination with the effective self-talk of producers.
“Whenever you catch yourself losing motivation on a project, look for the implicit ‘have to’ in your thinking and make a decision at that moment to embrace the path — as it is, not the way you think it should be — or let go of it. It’s your choice.” -Neil Fiore, The Now Habit
Rephrase your self-talk by identifying negative self-talk.
In The Now Habit, Neil Fiore, provides the following examples:
“I have to.” –> “I have to, but I don’t want to.” –> “I have to, but if I were powerful I wouldn’t.”
- This statement offers a sense of ambivalence and victimization that actually justifies procrastination. Challenge the statement with a statement of choice and an attitude of empowerment
- Replace “I have to” with “I choose to.”
“I must finish.”
- Replace this vague and overwhelming statement with “When can I start?
“This project is so big and important.” –> I don’t see how I can tackle such a huge task.” –> “This project has to impress everyone. This is my one big chance in life.”
- Replace this statement with “I can take one small step.” “I choose to start with one small step.”
- I can take one small step: Do one rough, rough draft; one imperfect sketch; one small hello. That’s all I need to do right now.
Finally, translate your knowledge into the context of change. Focus on utilizing effective self-talk to create behavioral changes, increase your commitment to action and avoid the paralysis of procrastination.
What can you do now to change the power dynamic to be in your favor?
What statements are key for your moving forward positively? Write these statements on post-it notes and keep them front and center daily. On my computer, I have a post-it note with a simple statement: There is nothing I need to do now except this. It serves as a constant reminder that I am in control of the present moment. I choose what happens right now – no one else has that power over me.
What do you choose to do now?
Related "ripples" you might enjoy:
- How to Take Action on a Daunting Project
- Get More Done #2: How to Set Powerful Goals and Take Meaningful Action
- Confronting Fear: A Super Simple Technique
- The Journey
- Less No, More Yes
This entry was posted on Monday, April 19th, 2010 at 9:45 pm and is filed under Goals & Productivity. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
12 Responses to “How to Talk Your Way to Greater Productivity”
Leave a Reply
Twitter: benspoont
says:
Wow this post is amazing.
Such fantastic ideas on how to talk yourself into productivity! I constantly try to rephrase things in my head in order to motivate myself to act :)
Twitter: carolynr
says:
Rephrasing is the best trick for increasing our productivity. It’s amazing how shifting the words in a sentence can make all the difference! Emphasizes the power of thought restructuring.
Wow you hit it right on the nail!
I “self-talk” daily, I find that if I don’t do it, I become ADD and lose focus of what I started doing in the first place. I try to think of it as your alter ego trying to help you accomplish what you want :)
Twitter: carolynr
says:
So true, Lee. Self-talk can be very helpful as long as we are aware of it! Awareness is the key.
Hi Carolyn,
Really enjoyed seeing the blog review from Leo last night on A Beautiful Ripple Effect. It had a ripple effect on me because I subscribed! What a lovely, lovely blog.
Words are so very powerful, and the words we choose can make a difference in our emotional state. Being creative and proactive rather than reactive gives us the power to determine what we want to achieve and how productive we will be. We cannot do it all. It is better to do a few things with intention and focus than many things with stress and resentment.
Can’t wait to read more.
Best,
Barrie (your fellow AList Blogger Club friend)
Twitter: carolynr
says:
How wonderful, the ripple effect is in full bloom!! Thank you for subscribing :).
I couldn’t agree more re: the power of words. I have a phrase on my inspiration board above my desk that reads: “Behind every word, there’s a story.” I truly believe that one word conveys so much more than its simple definition.
Thank you for these reminders: “We cannot do it all. It is better to do a few things with intention and focus than many things with stress and resentment.”
Twitter: AngArtemis
says:
Hi Carolyn, I just wanted to comment and say that I think you have a beautiful blog. I found it due to the Blog Review in our A-1 Club, which I’m a member of too. Your blog really conveys a sense of calmness and serenity – which I think we all need so much in this day and age. I also resonate with your theme of inspiring others, as I try to do the same.
Your post couldn’t be more timely either. I’ve been struggling with so many “shoulds and have tos” in my life. Of course, I know better, but sometimes you need a good swift kick – you know where – to remind you that you’re putting too much pressure on yourself. Your post was my kick in the – you know where. Thank you for that!
Angela Artemis´s last blog ..What’s Love Got to Do With Reality?
Twitter: carolynr
says:
Thank you for your kind words, Angela. I am so grateful :).
And always happy to provide that kick!! I need it all the time as well!
Twitter: casscomerford
says:
I am going to be using the “when can I start” phrase today. There is this one task that i’ve been procrastinating and I’m going to give myself the gift of starting today and temper those negative messages.
Twitter: carolynr
says:
Me too! So happy you found that phrase useful and hope you’ve begun starting!!
Love your final phrase: “give myself the gift of starting today and temper those negative messages.” –> such a beautiful reminder
Twitter: WhenIGroUpCoach
says:
Ain’t it amazing how semantics is such a huge part of the puzzle?
A big red flag pops up every time a client of mine says, “Should.” I let them finish their sentence & then point it out to them. 9 times out of 10 they let out a sigh & simply say, “Yeah” or “Wow.” Once it’s pointed out to them it gets them thinking. And I think for me that “should” is out of my vocabulary for good, although you should (OK, maybe not) hear me try to think of new words for “should” when I know I’m about to say it. Not intelligent, but that’s OK.
Also, I’ve noticed such a big difference by replacing the words “Sales” & “Marketing” with the word “Invite”, & replacing the word “Advertising” with the word “Pimpin’.” Keeps it fun & light & welcoming & non-scary.
Semantics is our friend.
Michelle | When I Grow Up Coach´s last blog ..Great Giveaway: “Nice to Meet You” Print from Artsyville!
Twitter: None
says:
Hi Carolyn,
Really enjoyed seeing the blog review from Leo last night on A Beautiful Ripple Effect. It had a ripple effect on me because I subscribed! What a lovely, lovely blog.
Words are so very powerful, and the words we choose can make a difference in our emotional state. Being creative and proactive rather than reactive gives us the power to determine what we want to achieve and how productive we will be. We cannot do it all. It is better to do a few things with intention and focus than many things with stress and resentment.
Can’t wait to read more.
Best,
Barrie (your fellow AList Blogger Club friend)