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"Everyone knows somebody that needs to read this book (Perseverance) !" –Kathie Lee Gifford, Live on NBC’s Today Show

"Perseverance offers… profound insight for all of us seeking to lead a meaningful life." –Daniel H. Pink, New York Times bestselling author of A Whole New Mind

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Archive for the ‘Tips + Techniques’ Category

Create a Serenity Trigger

March 8th, 2010 | 10 Comments »

Learn to pause…or nothing worthwhile will catch up to you.
-Doug King

In our fast-paced, multitasking, day-to-day lives, we often find ourselves adrift in chaos. Within this chaos, finding our inner calm is just as important —actually more so — than completing our next task. It allows us to recharge and breathe just a bit easier. It’s incredible what just five minutes of serenity can do for your energy level and mental state.

Now, think about how you currently deal with chaotic moments in your life. If you would like to change your current response to those chaotic moments, create a serenity trigger that will help you find a peaceful place whenever the need arises. This trigger serves as a reminder for you to take a few minutes away from what you’re doing to find serenity amidst chaos. It could be as simple as an image or a positive word/phrase.

This trigger serves as a personal anchor to help you find serenity and return to it over and over again. It allows you to take time to refresh and refocus. These simple moments of calm will make a difference in both your attitude and energy level.

Take Home Message:

Find serenity amidst chaos by utilizing a serenity trigger. Indulge yourself in the beauty that unfolds within these moments of calm.

An Example:

My primary serenity trigger is an image of a beautiful flower blooming within a simple mason jar. Simple, yet a powerful reminder for me that much like that flower, in order to bloom, I need specific nutrients. One such nutrient: serenity.

What is one of your serenity triggers?

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Posted in: Happiness, Inspiration, Tips + Techniques

The Art of Forgiveness

September 18th, 2009 | 1 Comment »

To Forgive or Not To Forgive?Extending the olive branch is often interpreted mistakenly as a sign of weakness. In reality, it represents one’s refusal to be controlled by anger and resentment.

Why Forgive?

My thoughts regarding forgiveness vary. Most articles on forgiveness argue that one must be able to forgive, regardless of the gravity of the offense that’s been committed. The outcome of this effort is the release of the toxic energy one builds up and maintains by not forgiving the wrongdoer. That belief may be due to how one interprets forgiveness. Simply stated, I see forgiveness as a form of personal power and inner control that provides us with the ability to move forward – rather than remaining mentally in the past. As such, the act of forgiveness and how one actually “forgives” is quite subjective.

Forgiveness puts you in the driver’s seat. It allows you to focus your mind on actions that turn something negative into something positive (or even neutral). It leaves you feeling empowered and ready to move freely rather than being restricted by something or someone. You look inward for strength instead of outward. Overall, forgiveness triggers a whole host of positive outcomes.

Tips for Forgiveness

In spite of the enormous benefits associated with forgiveness, actually doing so is far from easy. Below are some tips to help you offer graceful absolution while maintaining your own dignity and self-respect.

  • Don’t feel like you have to forget. We’ve all heard the old adage “forgive and forget,” but the two don’t necessarily go hand in hand. Just because we offer forgiveness, that doesn’t mean the pain of a betrayal or the sting of harsh words spoken during an argument are magically erased from our minds. A sign of successful forgiveness is often the ability to remember the hurtful incident without the ugly emotions and anger that accompanied it originally.
  • Create a climate for forgiveness. It’s much easier to offer amnesty when you cultivate the right environment. For instance, when you maintain a positive attitude, focus on what’s good in your life, and banish negative thoughts, you’ll be much more likely to forgive.
  • Make a list of blessings. When you concentrate on the good things in your life—family, friends, favorite activities, or a rewarding career—there will be less room for pain and negativity, which makes it much easier to overcome your grievances.
  • Be patient. There are many different degrees of forgiveness. While a minor infraction may be forgiven almost immediately and without much thought, deeper transgressions can require more time. In these cases, don’t expect forgiveness to happen overnight. Move gently through the process of forgiveness.

Learning to Forgive Yourself

What happens when your anger is self-directed? Clearly, no one is perfect, and we’ve all said and done things we later regret. All too often, it can be even more difficult to forgive ourselves than to offer clemency to others. Although it’s important to hold yourself accountable for your actions, moving forward and learning from your mistakes is essential to achieving inner peace and happiness. Below are some tips for achieving the art of self-forgiveness.

  • Make amends. If your actions have resulted in someone’s hurt or betrayal, the first step toward self-clemency is recognizing your behavior and offering a sincere apology. That said, a simple “I’m sorry” may not be enough. Consider offering the person the opportunity to express his or her feelings about what happened, and be prepared to take the steps necessary to alleviate any anger or distress.
  • Be specific. Identify the specific transgression you committed and work on coming to terms with it. For example, instead of trying to forgive yourself for being a bad friend, narrow your focus to what you did or said that caused the offense, such as spreading a rumor or betraying someone’s confidence.
  • Talk through it. Seeking a sympathetic audience, such as a therapist or trusted friend, can be a huge help in pardoning a past transgression. By seeing the situation within the context of a healthy relationship, you’ll be more likely to find the grace you need to forgive yourself.

Whether you’re on the receiving or the giving end, the act of forgiveness can improve the quality of your relationships, and elevate you to a new level of peace.

Have you mastered the art of forgiveness?

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Posted in: Tips + Techniques

How to Turn “I Can’t” Into “I Can”

September 1st, 2009 | 4 Comments »

Not a Morning Person!So often the only thing stopping us from achieving a goal? Ourselves. We tell ourselves that we can’t do something or that we are not good at something simply because we’re not used to doing it or because we have never tried it.

For instance, for years I’ve been telling everyone—including myself—that I am not a morning person. I don’t even know my name in the morning. I’m a night owl. I don’t function before noon. Mornings are not in my genetic code.

I’ve organized my life around this belief. If I need to do something that requires a lot of creative thought? I schedule it in the afternoon or evening.

Last week, however, I was scheduled to do a series of radio interviews to promote my book Perseverance. Of course, I would have liked to have done the interviews in the afternoon or evening, but I didn’t have a choice. These were drive time shows. Either I did the interviews early in the morning or I lost my opportunity to do them altogether.

I firmly told myself, “I can do this.” I didn’t let myself believe otherwise.

The night before my first interview, the power went out. My alarm didn’t go off. Two minutes before the scheduled interview, I just happened to wake, look at my watch, and see the time. I got out of bed and on the phone. I did the interview on autopilot, and I pulled it off.

Not only could I function in the morning, I could do it without the use of caffeine and even without any preparation. Just think of how much better I could be in the morning if I had time to prepare!

So on the rest of my interview mornings, I did just that. I got out of bed at least 30 minutes before the first interview, so I had time to have breakfast and coffee and review my notes. By the end of the week, I was wondering if there was anything I couldn’t do in the morning.

The experience taught me these lessons about turning “I Can’t” into “I Can.”

Believe in yourself. Don’t give yourself any other option. If other people can do it, so can you.

Find ways to ease yourself into it. For instance, I got up earlier than needed so I could prepare. What can you do to make this unfamiliar experience feel more familiar?

Give yourself a check mark. I created check boxes on a piece of paper. I checked off a box each time I successfully completed a morning interview. Then, before upcoming interviews, I looked at my checked boxes and said to myself, “I did this before, and I can do this again.”

How do you turn the feeling of “I Can’t” into “I Can?”

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Posted in: Goals, Perseverance, Personal, Productivity, Tips + Techniques

11 Ways to Find Serenity Amidst Chaos

August 10th, 2009 | 27 Comments »

Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no trouble, no noise, or hard work. It means to be in the midst of all these things and still be calm in your heart.”

- Unknown

SerenityIn our fast-paced, multitasking, day-to-day lives, we often find ourselves adrift in chaos. I have a lot on my plate (plates, really), and I know full well that I’m certainly not the only one!

Within this chaos, finding our inner calm is just as important—actually more so—than completing our next task. It allows us to recharge and breathe just a bit easier. It’s incredible what just five minutes of serenity can do for your energy level and mental state.

Begin this week by using a special power—the ability to find serenity amidst chaos—and watch as the beauty of the week unfolds around you. The following is a brief menu of serenity options from which you can choose. By all means, indulge yourself this week!

1. Breathe. Those seven letters can instantly trigger a calming response. Just close your eyes, take a deep breath, count to three, and release. Repeat as necessary.

2. Rock Out. Take a quick four-minute break from your work to listen to your favorite song. You’ll probably find that it will calm you down, pump you up, or bring back great memories. Regardless of the genre, give yourself a moment to enjoy the music that will transport you to a place of pure happiness.

3. Uni-task. Yes, you read that right. Instead of believing in the mantra of more is better, allow yourself to focus on each task at hand, one at a time. This will allow you to de-clutter the other tasks that are taunting you from the periphery of your mind.

4. Step away. Let me guess, you’re staring at a screen just now, right? The television screen, the computer screen, and even the smartphone screen have become the interfaces with which we interact most often. When you’re piling on the work and begin to feel overwhelmed, take a step away, or simply turn your chair around for a minute or two. When you do, you’ll instantly regain the clarity you need to continue.

5. Stop! Think about…things. Placing yourself on autopilot does little more than cloud your mind. Instead, take a minute to organize your thoughts and tasks. This way, as you embark on that checklist, you’ll have a clearer vision of your day. After all, improved clarity brings about greater focus—so watch as you execute all of your tasks.

6. Take a Fresh Air Break. When you feel that you’re being pulled in every direction or that you’re stuck in a certain project, take a minute to walk outside and breathe in the fresh air. This will help you reconnect briefly with nature (even if you’re in the middle of a hot city). More importantly, it can help you get back to work with a revitalized attitude.

7. Read. If you’re in the middle of working, prompt your brain to switch gears by reading something new and interesting. This is a great way to continue the learning process with a broader scope. If you’re at home and everyday stresses are getting to you, reading can be a great way to relax. The images and emotions your brain conjures up simply by reading words will certainly be a welcome method of restoring yourself.

8. Reconnect. When life’s chaotic journey begins to get too far under your skin, it’s important to take a step back and reconnect with someone you’ve met along the way. We are greater than the sum of our experiences, and these include the relationships and interactions that have propelled us to where we are today. Simply pick up the phone to learn how someone else is doing and what they are up to in their own lives. A reminder of the memories will be an added bonus.

9. Stretch. Flexing those muscles and moving your body around is a great way to relieve some of the tension being built up in your muscles. Stretching helps you to continue marching on and allows you to reject the manifestation of any stress—literally and figuratively.

10. Laugh. It’s the most important of all medicines, and taking a minute to laugh with others or even at yourself will definitely reinvigorate your mind and soul. Adopting a lighthearted approach to the chaos that surrounds you will help you return to a tranquil place.

11. Create a Serenity Trigger. No matter how you deal with those chaotic moments in your life, create a serenity trigger that will help you find a peaceful place whenever the need arises. My serenity trigger is an image of a beautiful flower blooming within a simple mason jar. When I visualize it, it reminds me to take a few minutes away from what I’m doing to find serenity amidst the chaos.

All of these actions represent different ways of approaching the same problem. We feel stressed because of the palpable chaos around us. When we do, then it’s time for us to find our place of serenity and return to it over and over again.

What is your serenity trigger? How do you find serenity amidst chaos?

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Posted in: Goals, Tips + Techniques, Top Posts

Actions Speak Louder than Words: 8 Ways to Move Forward Today

June 3rd, 2009 | 9 Comments »

Moving Forward

Do you create “perfect” project plans and then find yourself feeling bored when it comes to actually taking action on those plans?

Do you start projects and then stop midway because you underestimated the amount of work the project would actually entail?

Do you ever feel as though you have so many ideas that you feel stuck, not knowing what to do next?

Well, I answer, “yes” to those questions very often! Fortunately, I’ve found ways to counteract those feelings in order to keep moving forward.

Footprints(1)    Give In and Say Goodbye to Your Project – Organize your project materials and put them away. Let yourself feel as if the project(s) no longer exists. Take an hour and do something frivolous just for you. Then, return to your project and see if you feel any different about it. I often find that I lose energy and motivation when my projects begin to control me. In contrast, when I control the projects—organize them, put them away, decide to let them go for an hour—then  I’ve regained control of them. Sometimes, this change in perspective is all I need to push me forward.

(2)    Take Micro-Steps – Break a large project into small, achievable steps. Not only will you get more done, you will feel much less stressed! The key to taking  these “micro-steps” is creating a plan that outlines how you are going to get from point A to point B despite that looming timeline. For example, Point A may be a blank Word document and Point B may be a 200-page book. While writing Perseverance, I found myself writing in my planner: Write Book. Can you imagine how scary that is to look at? So, rather than recording just Point B, create Point A1 to Point A2, to Point A3, and so on, until you finally reach that elusive Point B. It sounds simple (and it is), but the effects are quite dramatic! [This tip inspired by Aby from Simplify101]

(3)    Join a Supportive Community or Group – Share your progress with an audience. An audience can be a great motivator. Through its help, you will want to move forward and share your success; if not for you, then for your group. You will be accountable to more than just one person—yourself. Of course, you can lie and tell your group that you did more than you actually did, but that will leave you feeling even worse. That’s why I wouldn’t suggest that tactic! When you begin to slip, tell your group and they will help get you back on track. Today, you can start by joining the Power of Less Online Challenge Community!

Picture 3(4)    Jump In – Start moving forward by allocating a small amount of time to the project. For example, use a timer and set it to 5 minutes. The    goal of this exercise is to spend 5 minutes doing one mini-step (ex. Point A1). Those five minutes will fly by, and you will likely want to spend more time on the project. If you want to spend 30 minutes on Mini-Step A1 today, you can break that into six 5-minute sessions, five 6-minute sessions, three 10-minute sessions, or one 30-minute session. See how much flexibility you have? Don’t box yourself in; instead, allow yourself to do mini sessions if you don’t have the mental energy to do the entire 30 minutes in one sitting.

(5)    Work Backwards – Think about yourself as if the project is already complete. What have you done? How do you feel? Now use this knowledge to create a path with a known destination. Pretend you are talking to a class of students. How would you explain to them how you got to where you are? Use this explanation to guide yourself from Point A to Point B.

(6)    Filter your Ideas – I generate about 50 pieces of scrap paper a day with ideas jotted down on them. These ideas are then left scattered all over my office, and they fill me with negative energy. I feel overwhelmed and unsure about where to start—much less what I’m doing! It’s as if the ideas are all begging for my attention. Put your ideas together and go through them.

  • Throw away the ideas that you no longer like or that aren’t really applicable at this point. After you finish this exercise, you’ll likely be left with about 20% of your original ideas.
  • Ask yourself which ideas are necessary or applicable to you today (e.g., writing a novel about shoes sounds fun, but can I do it anytime in the near future… no!) so, that one goes into the garbage! Don’t let “fun” cloud your judgment! So the second step is to filter your ideas and get rid of the ideas that may seem great but aren’t realistic anytime soon. At this point, you’ll likely be left with 10-15% of your original ideas.
  • Go through your remaining ideas and look for any overlap. Do two of the ideas say the same thing in different words? Do two of the ideas relate to the same project? Put similar ideas together and throw out any duplicates.
  • Now, decide what you will do with the remaining ideas. You can create a document on your computer for “ideas” and organize them by category, thus creating your own “idea database,” or you can include the idea in a project on which you are already working (e.g., research on animal communication).

–> The Result: Your ideas are now under control and should create much less mental noise!

(7)    Bribe Yourself! – Sometimes we have to give ourselves a little positive reinforcement to get something done! That doesn’t make you a bad person – it makes you human.

(8)    Reevaluate – If you try everything and still feel horrible when you think about the project, then simply reevaluate why you’re doing that project. Think about why you feel awful when you’re working on it. We all have projects like this, so invest some time reflecting on the overall picture and how this project corresponds with it—or not. Allow yourself to let go—let go of “perfect.” Then, you can let go of the yucky feeling associated with “letting go.”

• • •

When you feel stuck or overwhelmed, how do you move forward?

• • •

{All images via istockphoto.com, image one: piskunov; image two: williv; image three: ericsphotography}

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Posted in: Tips + Techniques

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing: 10 Sources of Inspiration

April 14th, 2009 | 21 Comments »

Summer Blue

… image via kristybee on etsy …

Do you have tools that you rely on for inspiration? Whether you want to write a private journal entry or a public blog post, how do you get inspired?

While waiting for that moment of creative genius to hit and for this blog post to spill onto paper, I became aware of “inspiration mode.” I never consciously realized this mode before today. I think this mode is actually pretty common. It’s the lull filled with things that make you happy – make you feel creative and inspired – and of course, make you feel ready to conquer the world!

I had planned to write about something a bit more structured today: inspiration boards. I won’t be talking about “inspiration boards” directly today, but I want to talk about “inspiration” in general, which is a great introduction to the topic of inspiration boards. I suppose this is a more natural beginning for a series of posts on inspiration boards. In order to begin discussing the broad topic of inspiration boards, one must have a good handle on general inspiration, which differs for each individual. So today, I am going to discuss 10 sources of inspiration that I personally use over and over again.

• • •

The Basics:
What is inspiration?
(Noun) The process of being mentally stimulated to do or feel something, especially to do something creative. [Oxford American Dictionary]
Ponder this question, what does inspiration mean to you?
Need some help: check out this great online resource – Creative Something: Inspiring your Creativity. One Idea at a Time.

I define inspiration in terms of the energy I get from a source. Is it positive or negative? Is it creative energy? Is it motivating… and so on? That is how I start. What do I gravitate towards (rather than away)? What do I enjoy and feel almost guilty for doing? It’s in these sources that I typically feel less cognitive strain and more creative thinking. It feels good. It feels fun. It doesn’t feel like work!

• • •

While, sitting, waiting, and wishing…

1)    Music. Quick Burst of Inspiration.
Create short playlists (about 5 songs) that you can listen to for a quick burst of inspiration. You may want to create different types of playlists for different types of inspiration. Do you need a song that makes you feel like writing, like working out, like focusing… and so on. Create a playlist that lasts approximately 15 minutes that you have ready to listen to whenever needed.

I am loving Susannah Conway’s playlists on her blog, Ink on my Fingers.

2)    Quotes. Words that Define your Mood.

Quotes are a fantastic source of inspiration; in particular, quotes that you refer to over and over again – the ones that are memorized and repeated multiple times a day. I usually find quotes organically while reading a book or an article. They jump out at me. I usually relate with the feeling that the quote describes or feel inspired by the words themselves.   And then they stick. If you tend to love quotes, but don’t have a way of keeping track of them see below for a few ideas.Margaret and Walter File

  • Write quotes in a little journal or notebook — designate an entire notebook to quotes or just a few pages of your daily planning notebook. It doesn’t need to be super organized — just nice to have them in one spot to locate later.
  • Put quotes up on an inspiration board. I put up my most frequently used quotes.
  • Store quotes in text documents according to different categories (e.g., books, moods, or any other categorization method).
  • Store quotes in an old-fashioned Rolodex. I recently started to do this and love the flexibility of having this paper method. I jot down new quotes on a little piece of paper and add them into my file. The Rolodex I use is super cute, which makes it more approachable (rather than a paper system that I will quickly abandon).

3)    Photos. Images that tell a Breathtaking Story.

Posy (Susannah Conway, 2008)

… “Posy” by Susannah Conway (2008) …

Photography is a beautiful source of inspiration – looking at photos and/or taking your own photos. I find wonderful photographs through flickr and etsy. My favorite photographs are by Susannah Conway. Susannah writes, “Each of my photographs is my attempt to unravel the world around me, to see the beauty in all things.”   Other incredible photographers with online portfolios to browse: Alicia Bock, Jennifer Causey, Yvette Inufio, Honeytree, and of course, Danielle Anthony!

You can look at photos online and/or order prints from individual photographers to create your own inspiring collection.

4)    Journaling. Otherwise known as Writing Therapy.
I recently started keeping a personal journal. I didn’t realize the therapeutic benefits of journaling until I started my own. I typically journal before I go to sleep about whatever is on my mind at the time. Some of my best ideas are jotted down in that journal. It’s where I keep those random ideas for “someday.” Little diagrams of how I see an idea evolving or the steps needed to make an idea concrete. I stick magazine clippings into it as well – so it’s a whole big journal of personal thoughts and ideas that have sparked creative energy within me.

5)    An Inspiration Board. Make me Happy!

Make me Happy! Inspiration Board

… image of my first inspiration board, Make Me Happy! …

This inspiration board is on the wall above my desk. It was my *first* inspiration board. It sat for about a month with a single post-it note in the center that says: Make Me Happy! I wanted a board that “made me happy.” And so that is how I started — my first creative venture. I’m starting my third inspiration board now on a different theme: A Beautiful Ripple Effect! I’m having a ton of fun brainstorming ideas for it and creating different projects. It’s a blank canvas and a wonderful source of inspiration. I also create mini inspiration boards for my mini personal organizer — love the idea of a portable inspiration board! It contains quotes, images, thoughts, and goals.

6)   Books. A Treasury of Inspiring Words.

I have a collection of about 15 books that I keep in my office all together. I have read these books multiple times and refer to them over and over again for inspiration. I have them close by and can always find exactly what I need in one of them. Some of the books include: I Thought it was Just Me (but it isn’t) by Brene Brown, Ordinary Sparkling Moments by Christine Mason Miller, The Organized and Inspired Scrapbooker by Aby Garvey, The Power of Less by Leo Babauta, Domino: The Book of Decorating, Presentation Zen: Simple Ideas on Presentation Design and Delivery by Garr Reynolds, Mindfulness by Ellen Langer and other inspiring reads.

7)  Blogs by Inspiring Bloggers/Writers. Simple Bites of Inspiration.

I may be biased, but I find blogs to be a great source of inspiration. In particular, I love blogs with a personal touch — typos, humor, less than perfect grammar, real world examples, and so on. Sometimes I need a blog with very few words (eye candy blogs), but most of the time I’m looking for inspiring articles to give me that creative edge. Reading a blog article is much more than just reading — you are given the key to a community of other readers interested in the same material. Within the comments, you can often find even more inspiration and community chit chat.

Some of my favorite blogs include: When I Grow Up, UpUp Creative, Decor8, Real Simple: Simply Stated, Treasuring, Made by Girl, Creative Thursday, Christine Mason Miller, Makeunder My Life, Annechovie, Creative Organizing, Melissa Loves, Ink on my Fingers, Ordinary Courage, Think Simple Now, Write to Done, and Zen Habits.

8)    Anything Family. And that includes Ben and Lila Rose!

Just thinking about my family and how much we love each other leaves me feeling incredibly happy, creative (and inspired)! I’m also inspired by how much each member of my family has done — from the little stuff to the really really big stuff. I’m proud of my mom, my dad, my sister, and my brother. We are all so different yet so driven to reach our dreams. Whenever I feel like something is too big for me to do, I think about what my parents did on their own. I know their story — and I know that at the end of the day being parents was their top priority. They taught me that you can do it all. It’s hard, but it’s possible. I could ramble on and on about them — that’s what it feels like (for me) to be inspired.

9)    A Beautiful Ripple Effect. Inspiration grows stronger as it is linked from one individual to another.

How can I describe this source of inspiration without the quote by Christine Mason Miller — not possible! I think I share this quote about every other post or so — have you memorized it yet?

A Beautiful Ripple Effect (Christine Mason Miller)

10)  Care. Commit. Change.® Inspired by others who care about a cause and commit to creating change.

Which artists are committed to creating change? Who inspires me? Well, I created an event just to answer this question! And it began TODAY!!! So exciting!! We already have 700 applicants for our scholarship program this year – which is the largest applicant pool we’ve had ever – and probably the largest applicant pool for college scholarships for young adult cancer survivors (anywhere) so we are hoping that this online auction will help us support these individuals in their quest to go to college.

Why support young adult cancer survivors when everyone is feeling the strain of the economy? Take that strain being felt by everyone and multiply it by at least 10. And that is what is felt by young adult cancer survivors, many are hundreds of thousands of dollars in medical debt. College is not a possibility — ever. We are changing that through our college scholarship program and by providing *hope* that people (like you and me) believe in them. Should the cost of surviving cancer be the loss of a college education? Absolutely not. Help me — Help them. The auction will end on Friday April 24th. 100% of every dollar donated (every dollar used to purchase an item in this auction) will go directly towards a college scholarship for a young adult cancer survivor. [Update: Auction is complete. Thank you!]

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9 Methods to Use When Returning to Normal

March 23rd, 2009 | 11 Comments »

BlogImage_3.23.09

How does one go from overdrive to baseline without losing his/her sanity?

I decided that I would willingly be the test subject for this little study — okay willingly may be too calm of a word — forced, perhaps?

When working on a lot of different projects in various roles, my life can sometimes feel like a circus. Day blurs into night and sleep can become a rare treat.

[Disclaimer: I don't recommend this for anyone.]

The question becomes: after being in “overdrive” how do we return back to “normal?” Normal is obviously quite subjective, but regardless of how we define it, I find that I typically utilize 9 methods to re-calibrate my life and regain a sense of normality.

• • •

(1) Mistakes are Made

“A great nation is like a great man: When he makes a mistake, he realizes it. Having realized it, he admits it. Having admitted it, he corrects it. He considers those who point out his faults as his most benevolent teachers.” — Lao Tzu

When working in overdrive, we can make mistakes. They can be little such as, “Oops… I spent too little time on that project,” or they can be a bit larger. And these mistakes can make us go a bit crazy. We can dwell on them and systematically assess them — torturing ourselves that we did something wrong even though we were working so intensely. This cognitive state can be like quick sand and can make any type of transition seemingly impossible. It’s easier said than done, but recognizing that we made a mistake can be the escape route.

Why?

Because even though we know we all make mistakes, we hold ourselves to different standards and so “mistakes” = “bad.” But it’s part of human nature and one of the greatest methods of learning. So it’s okay to admit, “I did this wrong.” It will get you moving forward much quicker.

Need some inspiration? Read the book, Mistakes were Made (but not by me) by Carol Travis and Elliot Aronson. It was a major eye opener for me recently.

• • •

(2) Establish a Transition Mode

“Don’t just do something… sit there.” — 100 Ways to Motivate Yourself (Steve Chandler)

Think of transitioning like moving from one house to another. It doesn’t happen immediately. You need to pack things into boxes, create lots of labels, often move into a temporary home before your final location, and then unpack boxes and peel off labels all before you are settled into that new home. Similarly, when working at 100% (i.e., overdrive) — regaining a sense of normality isn’t something that happens when you wake up the next morning. You’ll need to be kind to yourself and realize that you may not be up to your normal workout routine or your typical night out adventures. You may need to mentally unplug, sit on the couch, and watch tv for 8 hours straight. That doesn’t mean you are a slacker! Realizing that “transition mode” is actually a normal part of your routine will allow you to release the tension associated with the conflict between “what I should be doing” and “what I really need to be doing.” You likely need to establish more “you” time to return back to baseline. Schedule this time into your calendar so you negate the tension before it has time to build upon you. It can feel uncomfortable so plan ahead to be good to yourself.

• • •

(3) It’s Okay to Ask for Help

“We all need cheerleaders. We all need supporters who look at us and exclaim, ‘Yeah You!’ Going crazy when we score a victory, whatever that victory may be. Supporters who feel deep in their hearts that when you win, they win. And if you lose, they’ll keep on cheering, because the most fundamental truth is that you’re worth your own cheering squad simply by being yourself.” — Ordinary Sparkling Moments (Christine Mason Miller)

You have a support system for that reason: support. When you need extra time to help you through a transition, don’t be afraid to ask for help. A good exercise to try: if your good friend were in this situation, what would you tell him/her to do? Is that what you’re doing? Usually we’re much kinder to our friends than we are to ourselves. So think about your answer. If you’re not doing the same for yourself, ask why. You don’t need to be the “strong” supporter every moment of every day. You can still be “strong” and receive support. Just Ask! It’s often during these little periods of time that we are able to forge closer bonds with our friends as we learn from one another and support each other in different ways. But never be afraid that you’ll appear weak if you ask for help. It’s actually quite the opposite.

waiting

• • •

(4) Focus your energy on a passion

It’s typically easier to expend energy when it feels like we’re not doing anything at all. You may be passionate about knitting and so spending some extra time knitting will actually help you to regain energy rather than trying to force yourself to do something that feels like pulling teeth. Because something feels “easy” doesn’t mean you’re being lazy. I know what it feels like to be doing something you’re passionate about and to feel like you’re not doing anything at all — wasting precious time. But in reality, you’re giving yourself a wonderful gift.

I love to write and read blogs. When I need “down time,” I will do these things. I have become more aware of the automatic thoughts that accompany down time and am better prepared to combat them. Just becoming aware of what you’re saying to yourself is helpful and can decrease energy wasted on negative cognition. We’re all about conserving energy and refueling our bodies :). If we do it for planet earth, we should be doing it for ourselves as well.

• • •

(5) Be Positive

All of these methods relate to one common theme: be positive. It is much easier to allow your mood to move into a downward spiral than to watch it like a hawk and try to focus on the positives. It takes energy. Realizing that your energy is well spent on just this activity is key. We often don’t even recognize this as something that requires energy expenditure. But it needs so much focus that when you feel burnt out and you haven’t delegated energy to this task, you will have much more cleanup to do to return to normal than if you focused on maintaining a positive attitude and moving forward. Recognize the smallest glimmers of hope and silver linings. You’ll be able to push through tough times and persevere much more seamlessly than if you feel like everything is just plain awful.

Need more Inspiration? Positivity Week is happening right now at When I Grow Up! Michelle is one of the most positive individuals that one is bound to meet so this is going to be one inspiring week for all to share! (and maybe she’ll continue it beyond this week!)

• • •

(6) Motivate Yourself

brave

“Whatever we learn to do, we learn by actually doing it; men come to be builders, for instance, by building and harp players by playing the harp. In the same way, by doing just acts we come to be just: By doing self-controlled acts, we come to be self-controlled; and by doing brave acts, we become brave.” — Aristotle

Notice I said, “yourself.” Don’t ask for the world to motivate you — you’re leaving far too much up to chance. Be prepared to motivate yourself. Know what keeps you focused and positive. Know how to “reward” yourself. Rewards have become a common word, but not a common act. Redefine what a reward is to you, today. What will make you regain light within — to create a sense of tranquility — to balance turbulence that often is out of your hands? Notice that spark of energy when doing something and create a personal treasury that you can turn to when you need to motivate yourself (e.g., quotes you can read, movies you can watch, songs you can listen to). When you feel the least motivated to move forward, these personal sources of motivation are typically one of the few channels that will guide you in the right direction.

• • •

(7) Notes to Self

“Get away from the crowd when you can. Keep yourself to yourself, if only for a few hours daily.” — Arthur Brisbane

I think a lot about how our words differ when they are spoken to ourselves as compared to when they are spoken to others (e.g., twittering our thoughts, blogging, e-books, podcasts, instant messages, and the list goes on). Do our thoughts evolve differently when they are formulated for ourselves as compared to when they are formulated knowing others will be evaluating them? I would have to assume that the answer is yes — it’s basic social psychology.

For some people, their thoughts may be more powerful when delivered to others. For others, it may be the opposite. I’m probably in between. However, it can be tricky to realize when our thoughts are meant for us or meant for an audience. When I am in “transition” mode, I tend to journal more and write down thoughts that are also in transition. They are meant for me and the act of just writing them on paper is powerful and often what I need to work through a certain thought or problem solve so I can move forward. Just because your words aren’t published doesn’t mean they aren’t just as valuable — if not more valuable. It’s important to value our self as a member of the audience and to realize that our thoughts don’t have to be announced to be meaningful. Great notes can be contained within your journal without guilt or worry. You are worthy of them.

I emphasize this point because you don’t want to block thoughts from being released due to a need for them to be perfect for publication. They don’t have to be published for all to critique. Realizing this allows us to untie the extra weight attached to such thoughts and as a result to worry less about the output and focus more on the process of change.

• • •

(8) From 30,000 Feet

“Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer. Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack of harmony and proportion is more readily seen.” — Leonardo Da Vinci

Look at your life from 30,000 feet — like what you see from outside an airplane window. Look at the big picture to regain a sense of what normal tends to feel like. Utilize this tool to help you re-establish a sense of balance. It serves as a compass from which you can see, create, see again, create again, and so on. It’s a back and forth movement from which you work on the ground floor and then take a moment to utilize a bird’s eye view. Sometimes re-establishing normal is more difficult than just taking a few days off and as a result — utilizing this big picture can become very helpful.

• • •

(9) Ordinary Moments can be quite Extraordinary

It’s within the ordinary that we usually find “sparkling moments” or the trigger for “a beautiful ripple effect.”

What does that mean?

Don’t underestimate what will actually occur when you are transitioning back to daily routine. I read an incredible essay this weekend that really reminded me of this sentiment. The essay is called, A Witness to Grace by Aldra Robinson, the Real Simple Life Lesson Essay Winner.

A tiny excerpt: “Working in that intensive care unit gave me countless sad tales, and some unfortunate memories are burned into my brain. But it wasn’t some catastrophic moment that taught me one of the most powerful lessons of my life. I learned that unbelievably awful things can and do happen. In truth, they are not such rare, isolated events. Each of us has a story that would break someone’s heart. Despite the grief and the unfairness of it all, we keep going. There are chores to be done. There are people who still need our care. There is a life to be led.”

• • •

The three most powerful words: we keep going.

True and simple.

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Posted in: Inspiration, Tips + Techniques

10 Steps for Overcoming Overwhelm

March 2nd, 2009 | 6 Comments »

nature image

Monday Inspiration: 10 Steps for Overcoming Overwhelm

“We spend most of our time and energy in a kind of horizontal thinking. We move along the surface of things… [but] there are times when we stop. We sit still. We lose ourselves in a pile of leaves or its memory. We listen and breezes from a whole other world begin to whisper.” — James Carroll

I decided to write this post after battling with feeling overwhelmed last week. I wanted to provide a more personal look into “overcoming overwhelm.” I have inserted excerpts from my personal journal to help explain how I utilize these steps. I hope these steps help you to look at overwhelming situations a bit differently and most importantly, help you to realize that you are never alone. We all feel overwhelmed. I realize my example is a bit superficial, but I don’t think it matters. I feel overwhelmed by things that are superficial and things that are far from superficial, but how I react to feeling overwhelmed tends to be the same regardless of the specific situation. And by no means have I figured out the solution to avoiding feeling overwhelmed. If someone has found that secret solution, I would love to know about it!

• • •

1. Recognize the Feelings

Determine the common feelings/thoughts/behaviors that accompany feeling overwhelmed.

To help recognize the feelings, I documented what happened to me last week when I started to feel overwhelmed. Below are notes from my personal journal.

I feel anxiety soaring through my body. My mind is jumping around so much that I feel dizzy. First thought: I am overwhelmed. How did I get here? What have I been doing? I’ve been working all day on research and coding. I’ve felt focused, calm, and productive. So what triggered, “I am overwhelmed?”

Don’t ignore these initial feelings. The key is to catch these thoughts/ feelings before they erupt.

Think of this step like the process of recognizing someone walking towards you on the street.

2. Attend to the feelings

After you recognize that someone is walking towards you on the stress, is the process done? Most of the time: no. You think about how you know this person. If it’s a friend, you’re probably going to want to stop and say hi. If it’s someone you don’t know, you’re probably going to keep walking. If it’s someone you’re in a fight with, you’re probably going to do something different. Now back to feeling overwhelmed.

So I recognized that I was feeling overwhelmed. But then what? The next step is to focus on the feelings — what is going through your mind? What led to those feelings? Below is the next section in my journal entry.

I went on Amazon to purchase a book on qualitative data analysis. On the home screen of my account, I saw an alert regarding a book that I had pre-ordered. It was a notification that the book would be shipped earlier than noted online. I noticed that it was my book, Perseverance, so I clicked on the link for more information.

When I saw the screen, I got excited and felt pride — wow my book is on Amazon. And then I scrolled down and my eye stopped on a very long number. [Remember - I had been doing data analysis all day]

My eye stopped at: Book Rank.
Book Rank: 2 million something…. YIKES! TWO MILLION!!!

It might as well just say no one is looking at this book and no one is going to buy this book when it comes out. Of course, I wanted to be really nice to myself so I clicked on the link to the list of “bestsellers.” It was conveniently located right next to my book’s ranking.

I proceeded to peruse the books on the bestseller list and their websites and their blogs and their magic tricks and I began to panic. I can do magic tricks too. I can write “professional” blog entries, hold virtual seminars twice a week, and speak in five cities a day. And so all of these ideas flood into my head and I am panicking. It’s already midnight so I must get started NOW!

And so I sit at my computer ready to create my “master plan.” But there’s a document already open on my computer — oh yes, my research project.

Reality hits quickly and a tidal wave of fear takes over my thoughts.

Rational thoughts hide in the background and are no where to be seen.

I ask myself, “what am I doing?”

Thought 1: I must quit grad school right now so I can focus solely on my book.

Thought 2: Is that really what YOU want?

3. Cross-Examination

Questions. Questions. Questions.

Even when my rational thoughts seem to have disappeared, I am able to ask questions. And so I do — lots and lots of questions.

I recognize that something is not right (I feel overwhelmed).
I attend to the feelings. (Don’t ignore what’s underneath the “overwhelmed.”)
I question.

If you look at my journal entries. I ask lots of questions throughout, such as:

  • How did I get here?
  • What have I been doing?
  • What triggered, “I feel overwhelmed?”
  • So I recognized that I was feeling overwhelmed. But then what?
  • What is going through your mind?
  • What led to those feelings?
  • I ask myself, “what am I doing?”
  • Is that really what YOU want?

Questions allow me to rationally restructure my thoughts even when I feel far from rational. They lead me to the source of the problem and allow me to go from panic mode to problem solving mode.

Most importantly, questioning the irrational thoughts is a way to defend yourself — your rational self.

Final section of journal entry:

It seems that my cross-examining worked. Rational thoughts came back to the surface.

It’s going to be okay. I realize that I am only one person.

And so what if others don’t understand that publishing a book and completing the first year of graduate school is a lot for one person.

Back to my reality.

And I repeat to myself a quote that has been with me all day:

“At any given moment you have the power to say: This is not how the story is going to end.” — Christine Mason Miller, Ordinary Sparkling Moments.

4. Reflect and Recharge

Every time I go through this process, I take time to reflect at the end. I congratulate myself for pausing and taking control when I could have ignored the feelings building within me. I recognize that I am doing something that is still very new to me and feel a sense of pride for taking the time to defend myself.

I realize the power of my book. It is changing the way I live my own life on a daily basis. The subtitle of the book is much more than just words. For many books, I don’t think this is the case. A subtitle can become a marketing tactic — to add a bit of “umph” to the title. But the subtitle of my book is focused on reality: How Twenty Young People Turned Fear into Hope — and How They Can Teach Us to do the Same.

For me to overcome feeling overwhelmed, I am turning my fears into hope. I am moving from a negative state, feeling paralyzed by fear, to a positive state, feeling energized by hope.

Through hope, I recharge.

5. Move Forward

Decide “next steps.” Determine what you are going to focus on without ignoring what has just led to you feeling overwhelmed. For me, I decided to focus on my research and my book. I needed to evaluate how I would balance both of these projects without feeling overwhelmed everyday. No master plan created. It’s still a work in progress, but a work that I am attending to and focusing on. Often, when things become overwhelming — even if we recognize them as overwhelming — the easiest thing to do is to ignore the overwhelming culprit. But we’re really not ignoring it. It is still in our mind, but just sitting there. We’re not taking any steps to move forward. And so it drains our energy and sits there untouched. Moving forward for me means that I make it a priority to not leave the feeling untouched in the back of my mind. I make it a goal to focus on it everyday for a few minutes so I don’t revert back to the cycle of what led to my previous feeling of helplessness.

green

6. Assess the Worst Case Scenario

For me, this step is never the fun part. However, it is often the most helpful part of the process. When we assess the worst case scenario — we are able to move out of the paralyzing state of fear.

So what was the worst case scenario in my situation?

The book’s ranking continues to drop and becomes the lowest ranked book on Amazon — EVER. There it is. I ask myself — So What??

I didn’t write the book to gain money or prestige. I wrote the book to tell a story and that’s done regardless of Amazon Ranking. So what is important to me? Where do I want to focus my energy with regards to the book publishing process?

My goal is to inspire individuals to focus on struggles (whatever they may be) from a different perspective. To give individuals hope that, even during rough patches, they can grow stronger. To share what I have learned from the amazing individuals within Perseverance. It’s often during the difficult moments in life that we find more meaning and joy. We all have within us the incredible power to persevere. To share the core message: learn to live with energy and passion, regardless of the obstacles you face, knowing that now is everything.

The focus from the beginning has been on respecting the quality of the book’s message. I feel that it’s becoming far too easy to sacrifice quality for quantity. And that is something I strive NOT to do with anything I undertake.

* What reminded me of the importance of asking yourself, what’s the worst thing that could happen? Tough Question Tuesday post on the When I Grow Up Blog

7. Ask for Help

“Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is this fragile thread that binds us to each other.” — Brian Dyson

This step is simple yet profoundly difficult. You must first admit to yourself that you are overwhelmed and then admit to someone else. And sometimes you won’t receive the help you need and other times someone will help you in just the way you needed. Last week, I asked for help on twitter when I was having major writer’s block. I didn’t think anyone would care or even respond. I was wrong. Aby Garvey sent me a clip from TED. I watched the video at least three times and have sent it to many people for inspiration. After watching the video, I was able to write. And I realized yet again that asking for help doesn’t equate to weakness, but to strength.

Just admitting that you’re overwhelmed (even if it’s just on a piece of paper) is healing. It translates the intangible into something concrete that you can work with.

The video is a speech by Elizabeth Gilbert entitled: A different way to think about creative genius.

8. Reality Check

  • Do I NEED to do everything NOW?
  • What can I defer?

Give yourself a break. Letting go of one current obligation helps to free up valuable time and leaves you with a little wiggle room. Easier said than done? I dropped a required class this year, statistics. I will need to make it up next year with the first year graduate students. I need the additional time and that’s okay.

9. Visual Reminders

I have two main visual reminders: my inspiration board (a whole other blog post) and my desktop wallpaper. I use my desktop image as a reminder of something I can do when life feels overwhelming. Sometimes it’s a quote — sometimes it’s an image. Right now I’m using images from lululemon’s website. Lululemon is known for their yoga clothing, but is much more. Their website is a reflection of their company’s motto: creating components for people to live longer, healthier, more fun lives. They have an entire section of free desktop images.

For me, yoga is something I can do in less than 5 minutes to help clear my mind, refresh, and recharge.

10. Finding Detours

Often we feel stuck or even set ourselves up to feel overwhelmed. I did that on this blog recently.

I wanted to do a four day giveaway event — four days in a row and end it with a wonderful announcement. However, I did this knowing that last week was one of the biggest weeks for me — research presentation, meetings in new york, birthday. But I did it anyway. And I only completed two days. I feel awful and overwhelmed and want to make it all up right now. But I can’t. I’ve realized that it’s okay if I don’t do my first blog giveaway perfectly. I’ll finish the giveaway event this week. Rationally, I know if anyone hates me for not putting my giveaway up on time that this blog isn’t for them. It’s not a giveaway blog or a professional blog. It’s a blog about living authentically and part of living authentically is being vulnerable and showing imperfection. Understanding that “not being enough” is a struggle we all deal with and a part of what makes us unique individuals. And so I will not neglect my blog for fear of not being a perfect blogger. Because I know I’m not a perfect blogger and do not want to even begin to strive for that.

To feel unstuck, we need to find detours. Detours are okay. No need to repave the entire road — just change directions. To get to a destination, there is usually more than one route.

• • •

Turning Fear Into Hope

And so it comes full circle. What led me to write this post was my fear tied to book publishing. And what resulted from that fear was hope instilled in me that beauty can grow from darkness and uncertainty. We just have to find the little bud of hope and hold onto it. We all have the power to do that. We all have the power to hold onto hope, attend to hope, feed our hope — like a bridge over troubled water.

• • •

How do you overcome overwhelm? What have you found to be helpful for yourself?

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Posted in: Authenticity, Personal, Tips + Techniques

Find Your Links and Feel Good

February 6th, 2009 | 8 Comments »

Feel Good List

image from upup creative

On the internet, we are accustomed to seeing links everywhere. We often click them to go further into a topic. By nature, we’re curious — so… we click the links, which are like sealed boxes, and experience instant satisfaction. When we click on a bad web link, we can easily click back and voila problem solved. However, the links within ourselves are not underlined and color coded. We can’t see them — so when we get stuck, it can be difficult to pinpoint where the link exists.

Before I typed this blog post, I wrote it on a piece of paper with a pen. I can’t think when I type. I’ve always seen this as a huge waste of time since writing long papers by hand can take a ton of time! I’ve been writing a lot recently and have noticed my hand gets tired after awhile and I stop writing for a few moments to let my hand rest. And in those few moments, I often come up with fresh ideas or the missing component of my argument. Just a few moments, when I rest my hand, may be a critical component of my writing process. I mention this little “aha” moment because when we feel stuck or uncomfortable (no link in sight), it is often due to something that seems very minor, such as sitting in one direction versus another direction or using a pen versus a keyboard. When we think in a logical, structured way, we can easily miss the important details. To recognize these little details, we must tap into our right-brain’s thinking style. Until recently, I neglected to engage my right-brain’s treasury. Exploring my creative side has given me more tools to examine life from different perspectives.

Bridging the gap between left-brain thinking and right-brain thinking, Julie Green has created “Feel Good Lists.” Don’t be fooled by the name, it is much more than a list. It is a powerful tool for self-change.

How often do your “regular” to-do list items trump your personal items?

Often, we (myself included) focus little on ourselves and then when we do we feel guilty that we didn’t complete items two and three on our “regular” to-do list. Rationally, it doesn’t make sense. Saying, “I feel good today,” should be a high priority in our lives. It sounds easy enough so why aren’t we doing it?

Because it’s not easy.

We’ve heard it a million times: action – action – action. We need to take action in order to change. And that is 100% true.

However, it’s in this leap from “thought” to “action” that we often get lost.

Why? Well, our webmaster has quit and our links are gone. Yikes. We need to create the links. This requires our logical left-brain and creative right-brain to work together.

Thought: “I want to feel good.”

That’s a pretty lofty goal so where do we even start? We need to define the sub-goals. In order to define your sub-goals, you have to really think about the specifics and ask yourself, “What do I need to do so that I can feel good?” For example, you may create three sub-goals, such as: practice yoga, express gratitude on a regular basis, spend more time with family.

Now, you have established specific goals to “feel good.”

And that’s where the “feel good lists” come in. Utilizing the unique structure of the feel good lists, you can tailor your list to your specific goals. You establish actions to do on a daily and/or weekly basis to help you along the way. Going through the thought process of establishing feasible actions can lead to some wonderful soul-searching and new creative outlets. On most occasions, you’ll have to dig deep to find the all-important link.

Establishing a list of “feel good” items creates structure (making your left-brain very happy!) and accountability.  Through these two key ingredients, structure and accountability, your goal remains in focus.

So now what? I believe the next step should always be “clear” and “simple” — note my username: clrsimple [my initials: clr]

Below are a few clear and simple ideas.

Feel Good this Weekend!!

Carolyn

• • •

Feel Good List (on Etsy)

Simplify101 Workshop — any of the workshops will help you through the thought process and taking action!

• • •

Think.
- Tap into your right-brain.
- Think creatively about what you want and what steps you need to take.
- Check out 100 ideas from Keri Smith

Trial and Error. You don’t need a perfect action plan. You just need to take action. Re-evaluate along the way and tweak your method as needed.

Actively look for connections — you never know when the “aha” link is going to occur — often during the most unexpected times.

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Posted in: Tips + Techniques

10 Techniques to Successfully Overcome Procrastination

January 28th, 2009 | 5 Comments »

Woman Working at Computer

My name is Carolyn and I am an information addict. My nemesis: blogs full of productivity systems that claim to make you do more today than ever before. Of course, I fall right into the trap and read these articles for hours at a time (and feel quite studious because I’m “learning”), but then I look at the clock and realize that there is no way that today will be my most productive. It’s a vicious cycle for an information addict.

I recently realized that what has helped me to be most productive has never really changed. In particular, there are 10 key methods that work for me and have been working all along. I just like the fancy productivity system names and thought something better may exist in the internet abyss.

1. Link Filtering
Don’t click on the links! Once you start clicking and digging deeper into a topic, you lose focus and energy. If you feel a link is incredibly valuable, bookmark it. I have found that I never go back to most of the links that I bookmark, which means lots of time saved!

2. E-Mail Naps
Take care of your e-mail program — turn off its constant buzzing and even the number that appears on your desktop of unread messages. Let your email rest :). When I am working, I quit my e-mail program and write e-mails that I would like to send in plain text documents saved with the subject of the e-mail. Then, I send the e-mails all at once when I complete a chunk of my work.

3. Focus
Focus on one task at a time. If the task you are working on is part of a larger project, define a specific goal for that period of time (e.g., read 10 pages or brainstorm ideas for book title). I write the goal on a post-it note and leave it next to me while I’m working.

4. Clear your Desktop
Clearing your desktop allows you to focus on one project without distraction from piles of papers or other nicknacks.

5. Take Mini-Breaks
When you begin to lose focus, take a 5-15 minute break away from your work area. Do something totally unrelated to work (e.g., take a quick walk, create a cute label, eat some fruit, listen to music, stretch)

6. Do what you DON’T want to do FIRST.
It’s yucky — I know. But afterwards the feeling of success is enough to energize you through the rest of your day.

7. Be Enthusiastic
When you were in school, did you learn the most from teachers who were enthusiastic about the subject matter or the teachers who fell asleep while talking about the same math concept for the 4th time that day? Even if you are counting pennies, bring positive energy to the task. Use positive self-talk and convince yourself that what you are doing is fun. If you’re writing, use a favorite pen. I use a bright colored sharpie when I’m writing and it does the trick! The key is to cognitively trick yourself into thinking what you’re doing is just wonderful. (Now you can see why I want to go into psychology!)

8. Reward Yourself
Sounds wonderful, but most of us probably don’t do it on a consistent basis. It’s a great incentive to push forward with a project. Create a reward system and you’ll be a bit more motivated to put one foot in front of the other.

9. Relabel “Procrastination”
We all find ourselves procrastinating and it makes most people pretty upset with themselves. It’s important to switch your mindset to something more positive. For example, you’ve been surfing the internet and browsing different online bookstores. You went online to find one book and then an hour later you haven’t found the book and feel as if you’ve been roaming aimlessly. You can get upset with yourself OR you can label that time as a break that you needed so that you can reenergize and move forward. You have the power to take control of the negative emotions you feel brewing and re-assess the situation from a positive mindset.

10. Let go of Perfection
Embracing imperfection is a struggle. We often delay acting on something because we want to do it perfectly. Rationally, we know nothing is perfect; however, it’s difficult to find the balance between doing something perfectly and not doing something at all. We need to leave our comfort zone and be okay doing something “good enough.” That in of itself is probably the largest hurdle to overcome.

What techniques work for you? Do you have difficulty doing something that you know is not going to be “perfect?” Or…. do you never procrastinate and do everything perfectly– oh goodness I hope no one like that exists!

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Carolyn Rubenstein

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