Is everything as urgent as your stress would imply? -Carrie Latet

In today’s harried society, stress has become an everyday fixture.  Our busy schedules, the internet, smart phones and texting have all contributed to our almost total inability to completely unplug from work, the world and our numerous other responsibilities.  The result?  We are a stressed out nation.  While fully disengaging from the constant worry in our lives may prove infeasible, there are ways to seize an opportunity to regroup, rejuvenate and de-stress now.

Stretch

Stretching increases flexibility and circulation, which can help you feel more relaxed almost instantly.  So go ahead and strrrrrrrrrretch.  Feel better?

Smile

Smiling has been proven to enhance our moods and diminish our feelings of anxiety. Besides, we all look better when we’re not sporting a sour puss!  To really look and feel your best, try to find something that truly gets your giggle on.

Get Stepping

Taking a quick walk can help raise your endorphin level and eliminate some of that tension, regardless of whether you can squeeze in a full mile or just a fast minute.

Pamper Yourself

Perhaps a full day at the spa just doesn’t mesh with your jammed pack calendar.  However, many spas offer mini-treatments that only require a small amount of time while still providing a huge, relaxing impact.

Deep Breaths

Fortunately, breathing is a requirement that we don’t have to set aside additional free time to achieve!  Take a moment, close your eyes and breathe deeply to get rid of some stressful toxins on the exhale.

Vent

Find a confidant (or therapist) to help release some of that pent up frustration.  You’ll be amazed at how motivated and reinvigorated you’ll feel once you start getting things off your chest.

Listen To Soothing Music

Playing gentle or classical melodies can help set the tone for your entire day.  If possible, download some free music applications directly onto your computer so you can continuously stream in the tunes.

Prioritize The Worry

When addressing the issues that have you feeling stressed, ask yourself; “Will this be important to me in a week?  A month?  A year?”  Posing these questions will help prioritize what truly deserves worrisome scrutiny…and what may be a simple overreaction on your part.

Steal Some Me Time

Getting a few “all about me” moments can truly help to regroup and refocus when life becomes a little too tense. For some “me time” tips check out this post!

Tea Time

Tea comes in all sorts of soothing brews and can be enjoyed virtually anywhere.  Steep a pot, inhale the relaxing aroma and sip…slowly.

Join A Gym (And Really Go)

Consistently incorporating exercise into your daily routine will help increase cardiovascular fitness and endurance while simultaneously decreasing your anxiety level.  Plus, you’ll have an opportunity to meet some new people and socialize.

Find Your Happy Place

Everyone has a place that puts them at peace.  When overwhelmed with tension, go there for a little R&R.  Physically not practical to get to that special location?  Close your eyes and travel there in your mind.  Do it….now…

Find A Hobby

Everyone needs a fun activity to provide distraction from the daily grind.  If you don’t have a current pastime, start with something simple that doesn’t require a lot of focus.

Bathe

Sylvia Plath penned; “There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won’t cure, but I don’t know many of them.”  How can you argue with that logic?

Sleep It Off

Even a quick “power nap” can have a huge impact on our focus, energy level and motivation.  When life becomes too stressful, steal a few z’s and awaken refreshed and ready to tackle the next item on your to-do list.

Write It Down

Journaling provides a great outlet for releasing stressful events and ordeals in our daily lives.  Plus, a journal offers an “in-your-own-words” account of previously tense moments.  Reviewing periodically can help you see if you tend to exhibit a pattern of unnecessarily sweating the small stuff.

Do Something Nice…For Yourself

We often take care of others in our lives, but when was the last time you gave yourself a little TLC?  Treat yourself to a relaxing beach day, go for a long solo bike ride or simply give yourself permission to curl up on the couch with a good book and you’ll immediately feel the tension diminish.

Sing A Song

Turn on your favorite tune and sing…loudly.  Tone deaf or not, you’re guaranteed to feel better.

Bust Out The Two Step

Since the stereo is already on, get dancing.  The movement will help release tension and provide some natural energy to face the rest of your day.

Keep It Simple

Do your best to not over orchestrate life events and responsibilities.  For example, rather than cooking an elaborate 3 course banquet for a planned dinner party, simplify the menu, serve it family style and have the company and conversation be the focal point of the meal.

Catch Up With Friends

Pick up the phone and make a date with your buddies!  Spending a little quality time with those that know and love us most can be an excellent way to alleviate some of the dread we’re often plagued with.

Break It Down
Sometimes tackling huge tasks can completely overwhelm us.  Determine if these action items can be simplified into easier to achieve step-by-step bullets.

Identify The Low Hanging Fruit

If you can’t break down the big stuff, scan your list of responsibilities to determine which ones will be the simplest to complete and start there.  Getting the easy stuff done will make the overall load lighter and give you a genuine feeling of accomplishment to keep you motivated as you power through the rest of your obligations.

Learn Something New

Sometimes stress can make us feel powerless and useless.  Counteract these feelings by learning something (anything) new.  Mastering a new concept, hobby, game, etc. will reinforce how smart and innovative you really are. This tip has been extremely powerful for me as I re-enter the world of academia and battle feelings of never knowing enough.

Eliminate Negative/Toxic Influences

Often, we bring enough negativity into our own lives without receiving heaping helpings from those around us. Identify any outside influences (co-workers, frenemies, etc.) that may be adding to your negative and stressful emotional load and eliminate them as much as possible.

Learn The Power Of “No”

Staying positive is a great thing.  However, saying “yes” to everything can truly overwhelm us.  Saying “no” and setting some boundaries can feel empowering and help keep your calendar free from any additional (and unwanted) responsibilities.

De-clutter/Donate Gently Used Items

Pick one closet in your home to go through and reorganize.  Create a throw away pile and a pile of items that can be donated to local charities.  The newly cleaned closet coupled with knowing you’ve done a good deed will definitely eliminate some negativity.

Channel Your Inner Guru

Meditation and prayer have long been touted as having healing powers.  Find a spiritual practice that works for you and implement it into your life daily to help soothe anxious thoughts. For a great look at how one woman incorporates spiritual practice into her life, check out on of my favorite reads: Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert.

Review Your Bucket List

We all have one – that list of things we plan on doing “someday”.  Make today that day.  Pick one item and coordinate a plan to get it done.

Volunteer

Find a cause or center dear to your heart and donate some of your time.  Helping those less fortunate than you is a great thing…and it will also bring some clarity and perspective to your own life.

. . . . .

Living a completely stress free life is practically impossible for most of us. However, with a little practice, patience and a healthy dose of self-forgiving, partially de-stressing our day to day existence is a very attainable goal.

Do you have a hard time simply relaxing?  Do you feel like tension and anxiety are normal staples in your emotional portfolio?  How do you de-stress when life starts to overwhelm you?  Please share in the comments!

P.S. Can you tell this has been a hot-topic for me as I wrestle with insecurities and stress-overload associated with the start of a new academic year and my wedding in 45 days!?

images: pin wheel designs (amy rubin flett)

Related posts:

1. 8 Ways to Steal “Me” Time
2. 50 Ways to Add Joy to Your Day
3. 11 Ways to Find Serenity Amidst Chaos

Inspiration and relaxation methods are not one-size-fits-all. Interestingly, we are inundated with so many new self-help techniques that it has become increasingly difficult to apply them in our everyday life.

Like most individuals, I need reminders to incorporate time for rejuvenation into my life. One such reminder is something I began playing with in college: the personal relaxation menu. A personal relaxation menu evolves with time and practice, but always aims to provide relaxation techniques that work for you in different circumstances. Although it’s a simple tool, it takes time to create this menu since it’s tailored for you, by you. I will guide you through the process of creating a personal relaxation menu over the course of three posts.

A note about my approach:

I crave knowledge. I experience intense excitement when faced with the unknown. Let’s call this excitement the essential fuel of my life, because that is exactly what it is. It gets me up in the morning and puts me to sleep at night. I ask questions all day long and never seem to get to the point where I stop searching. If this sounds a bit insane and obsessive, let me assure you that IT IS. It is my greatest strength as well as my Achilles heel. I tell you this as a warning before we start part one of this exercise. Consider yourself officially warned.

The most difficult part of writing about inspiration and self-care is to think about how words can be translated from knowledge into action. It’s one thing to write and read; it’s another thing to do and create change.

You change your life by first determining that you want to create change. I won’t spend time convincing you to do this. Instead, I will assume that you’ve already come to this conclusion on your own and now, by reading this post, you want to determine HOW you can create that change within your life.

Step two is connecting the dots between “I want” and “I will” followed by “I am!” This is what this series is all about: the desire to experience more relaxation within your life as well as a focus on creating that tangible change. If that’s what you want, you’re in the right place.

Here’s where we’re headed:

• Part One: An Inspirational Scavenger Hunt. [Collect]
• Part Two: Time and Energy are not equal. Play match-maker and set up blind relaxation dates. [Divide]
• Part Three: Connect the dots. Put the Relaxation Puzzle Pieces Together. [Conquer]

Part One: An Inspirational Scavenger Hunt. [Collect]

Part one is the most fun! In this part, you will become aware of what you gravitate toward—what types of inspiration and relaxation do you most crave? What makes you happy?

I began my own inspirational scavenger hunt with one guiding question on a sticky note: What makes me happy? I had never asked myself that question before, so it worked like a charm! It was new and exciting. Whenever something made me happy, I made sure to document it wherever I was and then put it onto my little treasure map each night. I loved the activity so much that I ordered a huge inspiration board online and put that question in the center of the board, with visual answers emanating from the center outwards. Some of these answers were on post-it notes; others were images printed from the internet or cut out of magazines. I still continue this ritual and am amazed at how much fun I can have locating simple things that make me happy.

The answers are endless, which is why I pre-warned you! I have included steps to help you begin your own inspiration scavenger hunt. Allow yourself at least 5-7 days for this activity. You may continue it for longer, but try not to spend months on this part without moving onto parts two and three!

How to Start Your Own Inspirational Scavenger Hunt

1- Start fresh.

Begin a new journal or document in which to store your notes from this adventure. If you enjoy writing in a journal more than typing notes into a Word document, use a brand new shiny journal for this scavenger hunt. It will provide an incentive to maintain momentum. If you hate writing in a journal, choose another way to start with a clean slate. Simple enough, right?

Take Action: Decide where you will keep your notes for the scavenger hunt. Purchase a new journal or pen if necessary. When you have your treasure chest selected, move on to step two.

2- Take Five.

Spend five minutes writing down a list of energizing activities. Focus only on positive, relaxing actions. Write down anything that comes to mind. This list is for YOU, not someone else. It is not an ideal list, it is YOUR list. What may be energizing to one person could be incredibly draining for another person. The key is to connect with what makes you happy and ground yourself in that space for five whole minutes (more if you like).

Take Action: Schedule five minutes in your calendar for this activity. It may seem strange to schedule time for yourself, but don’t let yourself be fooled. You are just as important as any other scheduled activity. Give yourself permission to focus on YOU, with no strings attached. That’s why we’re starting tiny. You can give yourself five whole minutes. When you complete this list, make sure you put it in your treasure chest for safe keeping!

-> Bonus: Take Five Worksheet (PDF Download)

3- Create a positivity treasury.

Bring awareness to how you feel throughout the day. When you feel a smile developing on your face or a boost in positive energy, jot down what caused this spark of happiness. At this stage, you are a non-judgmental detective. You may notice that that you feel happiest during a seemingly mundane activity or when you’re doing nothing at all. All you need to do is recognize the feeling, which may feel strange since we typically focus on what is making us feel “blah.”

Take Action: For a minimum of three days, play detective and note when you feel positive (e.g., confident, eager, energetic, fulfilled, hopeful, inspired, intrigued, optimistic, proud, grateful). Keep a record of what you are doing when you feel this way and store the clues in your treasure chest.

-> Bonus: Energy Log Worksheet (PDF Download)

4- Reflect.

At the end of your scavenger hunt (or periodically during the three days), write down any observations about what you have experienced. Let your thoughts spill onto the paper. If you enjoy journaling, you could journal about the experience. If you need a little more structure, try writing a letter to yourself, recounting the scavenger hunt and any accompanying thoughts/aha! moments as well as those pesky negative thoughts that love to visit. Keep it simple and easy.

Take Action: Set aside 10 minutes or commit to filling an entire page with your reflection notes. Put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard and let your mind do the talking!

5- Organize.

I love to cross my t’s and dot my i’s, especially when it comes to enjoyable activities! If you crave a sense of closure, complete this scavenger hunt (i.e., part 1) by collating all the tidbits you collected into a lovely list. Create a list from scratch or download the inspiration log worksheet. On the worksheet, fill in your favorites and/or cross out any items that don’t work for you. Then, add the final list to your treasure chest.

->Bonus: Inspiration Log Worksheet (PDF Download)

. . .

Do you have any questions? Let me know in the comments below. And be sure to chime in about what makes your inspiration log or any insights you may have!

Part 2 of the series will be presented on Wed. September 15th. Subscribe to be notified as soon as it’s published!

Related posts:

1. Create a Serenity Trigger
2. How to Create a Positivity Treasury
3. Tuesday Treasures: What do you treasure?

The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.
Sydney J. Harris

Are you exhausted from continuously running at breakneck speed?   Do you feel trapped in a draining cycle of working, parenting and/or incessantly checking things off an endless list of personal action items?  Or, are you simply convinced that stolen moments of solitude and tranquility have forever been replaced by the ceaseless demand of your daily routine?

We’ve all been there.  In a world full of the super-busy and over-scheduled, it’s often difficult to carve out quality moments meant just for us.  This ever-elusive “me” time helps us to regroup, rejuvenate and reinvigorate the doldrums of our daily routines.  With a little creativity and flexibility, finding a few moments of calm amidst the grind of day-to-day chaos is possible.

Set the Alarm
For the early birds among us, even setting the alarm 10 minutes early will allow for a little time to ourselves.  Sip a morning beverage, listen to some soothing music, read the paper or just sit alone with your thoughts to set a more relaxing tone for the rest of your day.

Take a Lunch Break
Too often we find ourselves eating while standing up over a sink or sitting in front of our computers during the noontime meal.  No matter where you happen to be when lunchtime rolls around, take the opportunity to unplug, unwind and enjoy whatever is on the menu for the day.

Put it on the Calendar
We typically put mandatory events and appointments (which we often don’t want to attend) on our day planners to ensure things get done.  Schedule some “me” time on the calendar on a daily, weekly or even monthly basis to ensure that time will definitely be set aside.

Break it Up
For some of us, even finding a block of 15 consecutive minutes can prove daunting.  Identify moments throughout the day when you have just a few minutes and jump on them.  Get up from your desk and stretch a bit, take a 2 minute walk outside or even do a set of push ups (or sun salutations for my fellow yogis!) wherever you may be.  Maximizing these “mini-breaks” can easily add up throughout the day and help recharge your batteries to keep on going.

Find a Buddy
At times, a plan to utilize “me” time can seem much like a self-imposed attempt to lose weight; hard to stick to without the help of a buddy for accountability.  Enlist the assistance of friends who also need some downtime and plan weekly or monthly outings.  Having others rely on your presence will help you stick to your plan to have a little fun and engage with buddies.

Jazz up the Necessities
Perhaps adding additional activities to your day just doesn’t make sense.  If so, find a way (utilizing your favorite creative hat) to make the necessities of every day a little more special and relaxing.  Everyone needs to eat -  so if cooking is a hobby, plan a special meal, play some background music and enjoy the preparation.  Bathing and hygiene are also (usually) requirements in our day.  Instead of taking a daily shower, plan a few extra minutes to draw a bath with some scented oils.  No time to soak?  No problem. Splurge on some new scented lotions and pamper yourself during post-shower minutes.

Optimize Travel Time
Sometimes, the car is the only time we have in our day to ourselves.  Rather than mentally going through the list of pending action items due in the hours ahead, seize the opportunity to enjoy some “me” time.  Check out an audio book from the library, play a favorite CD or even just roll down the windows and enjoy some fresh air in to wherever your commute takes you.

Create Bed Time Boundaries
For the night owls like me, set aside a block of time every evening as designated downtime. Then, stick to it.  Find a quiet spot for some meditation or journaling about the day’s events.  You’ll go to bed relaxed and better able to face the onslaught of activity the next morning will bring.

Take Action!

Armed with these tips and tools, it’s time to implement a plan of action.  Decide which methods for sneaking in some solitude will work best for you and select a non-negotiable “start date.”  Don’t worry if, initially, you can only commit to small increments of time spread out throughout a week, month, etc..  The most important thing is to simply keep me time on your radar.

Successfully stealing these me time moments can play a significant role in your overall outlook and ability to effectively navigate the ebb and flow within each week

Do you struggle with finding time just for you?  What hurdles consistently hinder you from achieving these moments of relaxation?  What are some proven methods you’ve used to obtain a little me time?  Share in the comments!

Related posts:

1. 30 Ways to De-Stress Now
2. 34 Ways to Enjoy the Winter Days
3. 50 Ways to Add Joy to Your Day

Why are you doing what you are doing? Without a goal to connect to your actions, it is difficult to maintain momentum and motivation. When the actions of a task are tedious and not intrinsically exciting, it can feel as if there is no larger purpose to them. But there is always a goal, and without acknowledging it, you are walking down a dark and windy path with no map in hand.

Reconnect with Your Overarching Goal

Get Excited. Reframe your work in a way that excites you. What will spark your energy? Use your imagination to create a compelling reason to attract you to your work. Try thinking about how you could persuade someone else to do what you do, and be as genuine as possible. Find the silver lining and magnify it. In his groundbreaking book, The Now Habit, Neil Fiore writes, “The type of work and commitment that is more compatible with the Now Habit is a commitment to a mission that focuses your energies and brings about inner harmony, a commitment that comes from a pull toward a goal and an excitement about the process of getting there.”

Create a Goal Statement. There are many ways to create a goal statement that you can use to remind yourself of your greater purpose. For the purpose of overcoming analysis paralysis, I try to create a statement that is specific to the task at hand and has a deadline within four weeks. Let’s start with an example that I recently utilized (Thank you to Aby Garvey for teaching me this wonderful goal-setting technique!).

“Today is September 1, 2010. I am confident and calm now that my research proposal is complete.”

• Include a specific date in your goal statement. Mark this date in your calendar.
• What will you complete by your set date? Don’t set yourself up to fail. Keep your expectations realistic.
• How will you feel when you complete this goal?
• Create your goal statement using the steps outlined above and display it where you can see it throughout the day in order to maintain focus on why you are doing what you are doing! It can be helpful to create sub-goal statements as well if your project is especially long and arduous. To create a sub-goal statement, you follow the same formula as outlined above, but use specific milestones toward the main goal. For example, “Today is August 12, 2010. I am confident and calm now that my research proposal’s appendix materials are complete.”

Restart Your Engine with Intention and Ease

Now that you have faced your analysis paralysis head on, you have tremendously weakened its resolve. Spend a few minutes refocusing on the task at hand. Do you have everything you need to complete your work? Collate all of your materials near your command center. Then, determine what actions you want to take today. Rather than focus on completion, concentrate on starting to maintain momentum.

Create a Mind-Map. If you are still feeling resistance, utilize a mind-map to break down the actions into micro-actions (each action should take less than 5 minutes). In the middle of the mind-map, you want to write your main goal to keep it front and center. For reference, you can see my simple example below.

Focus on Action. You are ready to take action! Often, preparing to take action can become quite draining so you need to rev yourself up again to actually make progress. To help give you that much-needed push, try the following focusing exercise from The Now Habit. The exercise below is a shorter version than the one outlined within the book (the full exercise begins on page 150 of the paperback copy of the book).

“Focusing is a two-minute procedure for shifting rapidly to the flow state by replacing guilt and stress with stress-free focus on the present.”

With each breath I am tapping into my creative self, opening more and more of my brain power to approach my task. My conscious mind may not know yet what to do, just as it doesn’t know how a puzzle will look until it’s finished. I may not know how I’m going to do this, but soon something will come to me, and then a little bit more will come. I will find the process very interesting, because while I don’t know yet what the solution will be, I do know that I will do it, and that part of me already knows how to do it. It will also be interesting to see how time feels different at this level of the mind and to discover about how much I will accomplish in such a short period of clock time.

Counting up from 1 to 3, I am becoming more quietly alert, and I am now ready to work in a focused, concentrated way, rapidly going from not knowing to knowing how to start: 1. I am more alert, relaxed, and energized, ready to use the superior wisdom of my subconscious mind. 2. I am ready to come all the way up to full alertness with my eyes open, eager to work in conjunction with the creative faculties of my mind. 3.

By taking action, you will begin to create momentum by weakening the resistance you feel between you and the finish line. Moving forward, you will likely confront analysis paralysis again, but each time you do, you can approach it with strength rather than letting it seize your control.

Chime in! What are your thoughts on getting more done or analysis paralysis? Or just say hello, it’s always nice to know that others can relate :).

… For some great discussion on the topic of inspiration, head on over to Spring for a brand new video!

Related posts:

1. How to Take Action on a Daunting Project
2. How to Talk Your Way to Greater Productivity
3. Get More Done #1: How to Confront and Weaken Analysis Paralysis

As I write this blog post, I am facing analysis paralysis, one fierce letter at a time. My mind feels like it is miles away, twisting and turning amid my graduate school research. Big projects, looming deadlines, and sometimes even mundane daily events can easily cause one to become detached, an observer of an experience rather than an engaged and mindful participant. Once you feel detachment, you feel less in control of your own life, starting an upsetting cycle that can lead you to over-analyze what you’re doing in an effort to become more immersed in the moment; however, as a result, you dig yourself into a deeper hole, leading to a feeling of being stuck, out of alignment due to analysis paralysis.

Power blogger Chris Garrett defines this yucky stage aptly. He writes, “Analysis Paralysis is where you can’t make any forward progress because you bog yourself down in details, tweaking, brainstorming, researching….”

So what do we do to break the cycle and confront the pesky instigator?

Modify Your Perspective

Often you can get so knee deep in the details of a scene that you can no longer see the landscape. But your mind doesn’t want to see the landscape, right? You need to focus on the details to get this done already! However, if you don’t take the time to remove yourself from the micro-level, you may be creating more work for yourself, or worse; you could cause yourself to meet some major hurdles down the road. Try adopting a different perspective to gain greater awareness of other aspects of your situation.

Find the middle ground between worst case and best case. Rather than think in extremes, think in shades of gray. Ask yourself: What is the worst case scenario? What is the best case scenario? Then, move towards the middle, a much more realistic scenario to plan for.

Alter your expectations. If you expect the journey to be steady without bumps or turns, you are setting yourself up for disappointment along the way. At the outset, prepare for roadblocks to appear as you take your plan into reality.

Engage Your Right-Brain

In order to overpower analysis, the brainchild of your left-brain, it is critical to awaken your right-brain’s creative muscles. Personally, this step is the most difficult for me to put into practice while under the power of my left-brain; however, this action is akin to magic dust, the secret potion that greatly weakens the reigns of analysis paralysis.

Trick your left-brain. Let your left-brain think it’s still in power by slowly warming up your right-brain. You can do this by introducing one “creative” element into your work at a time. If you’re working in an Excel File, try shading the columns into a fun array of colors. If you’re typing, use a fun font and/or play with the font colors. If you’re working away from the computer, you have the most wiggle room. I love using a whiteboard to brainstorm with big multicolored markers and make drawings. Or you can use colored pencils, crayons, and big pieces of paper – let your imagination run wild while still embracing your left-brain’s need to keep working.

Unleash your creativity. Take a break for a minimum of 10 minutes (use a timer if you must). Move away from your computer or simply turn off the monitor and focus fully on a single creative activity. You may want to draw on a piece of paper, write a fun letter, or snap a photo. The possibilities are endless.

Great Creative Fuel

• The Creative Advantage Book: Unleash Your Creativity and Change the World! by Guillaume Wolf
• The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron
• The Creative Habit: Learn It and Use It for Life by Twyla Tharp

Move Your Body

It is easy to get stuck in your head and continue the cycle of over-analyzing even the simplest of tasks. I’ve found that the quickest way to gain momentum and take meaningful action is to move my body. As simple as it sounds, it works! And it can take as little as 10 seconds.

Move away from your chair. Stand up and try jogging in place for 5 to 10 seconds. Notice how your body feels. Where are your arms? Are they tense by your side or swaying freely? Is your upper body slouched over or upright? How does your neck feel? Now, try moving again for another 5 to 10 seconds, but this time, explore your space. If you’re in a public office, try walking swiftly to another area of the office. When you let your body move to another location (rather than staying in place), you will notice changes in your body and mind. Do you feel a little more relaxed? Is the hamster wheel in your mind slowing down a bit? Take note of any changes you feel and experiment with this activity over time. Then find what works best for you as a quick way to engage your mind-body connection during your hectic work schedule and utilize this activity as often as you can throughout the day.

. . . . .

On Tuesday, I’ll be exploring how you can begin reconnecting your actions to an overarching goal, and how you can focus on getting more meaningful work done each day.

In the meantime, if anything in this article has struck a chord with you, I’d love to answer questions, offer support or simply hear your experiences. Just leave a comment, drop me an email, or use the contact form.

image: katie kirk

Related posts:

1. Get More Done #2: How to Set Powerful Goals and Take Meaningful Action
2. How to Take Action on a Daunting Project
3. How to Talk Your Way to Greater Productivity

Mindful Reading Tip! Try reading the quotes slowly. Allow your eyes to gently soften then close after you read each one, visualizing the words and what they mean to you. Just like a delicious piece of cake that you want to savor! But not all cakes are created equal, so taste this collection and notice if one outshines the rest. Then, sit with that quote for a couple of minutes and let its words work their magic! Below are 21 curated quotes just for you!

The great opportunity is where you are. Do not despise your own place and hour. Every place is under the stars, every place is the center of the world. -John Burroughs

Live your life each day as you would climb a mountain. An occasional glance towards the summit keeps the goal in mind, but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vantage point. -Harold B. Melchart

Don’t be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves. -Dale Carnegie

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. -Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man would do nothing if he waited until he could do it so well that no one could find fault. -John Henry Newman

In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity. -Albert Einstein

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? -Marianne Williamson

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. -Lao-Tzu

Things do not change; we change. -Henry David Thoreau

It isn’t that they can’t see the solution. It is that they can’t see the problem. -G.K. Chesterton

Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible. -St. Francis of Assisi

Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time we fall. -Confucius

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. -Helen Keller

The greatest mistake a man can make is to be afraid of making one. -Elbert Hubbard

It’s not that some people have willpower and some don’t. It’s that some people are ready to change and others are not. -James Gordon

You have to get to the point where going for it is more important than winning or losing. -Arthur Ashe

Let me tell you the secret that has led me to my goal. My strength lies solely in my tenacity. -Louis Pasteur

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. -Ambrose Redmoon

Often you just have to rely on your intuition. -Bill Gates

It’s easier to live with disappointment than regret. -Andre Agassi

The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are. -J. Pierpont Morgan

Did you have a favorite quote? Do you have another quote to add to the mix? Please share!

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Thank you to @chadrem and @SafetyInNumbers for contributing to this post on Twitter!

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Today’s post is a little different… no sage advice or aha! moments to share (still there?)… instead I want to talk with you about blogging and how I’m trying to learn as I go. I crave structure and beautifully created project plans; however, when it comes to blogging, structure and plans don’t work for me. I find that as soon as I turn blogging into a project with a start and an end, it quickly becomes another obligation in my already obligation heavy life. And if blogging feels like an obligation, I don’t show up as my essential self. Instead, I enter with expectations and rules to follow — no longer enjoying the process.

Recently, I’ve been telling myself that I am in a blogging rut! I’m not even sure what that means, but my mind has really stuck onto this concept. Something is missing, but I can’t put my finger on what that “something” is just yet. I think the “rut” is a combination of various factors: comparison and judgment (my posts aren’t good enough = I’m not good enough = well, what am I doing? = and around we go again!), personal factors (how much I can share on here about what is happening in my day-to-day life, while maintaining clear boundaries between my personal, professional, and online life), and learning (what is working for me and what isn’t working for me). Now, that’s a lot to process! Rather than berate myself for not having everything figured out, I’m focusing on letting go of the need to know. Uncertainty is scary when we choose to let it take the reigns, but letting go of the desire to create a state of certainty enables us to reestablish a sense of control.

I am learning to show up and acknowledge what is. Simply noticing how I’m feeling without an obligation to fix the situation is liberating. For the past week, I have been checking in with myself at various times throughout the day, utilizing a simple little checklist. About five times a day, I’ll stop what I’m doing and complete the simple list. It consists of six items on a small index card. Each morning, I cut one index card into five smaller cards to use for the day. I write the same list on each of the cards.

:: The Itty Bitty Check-In List ::

day of week:
ticktock:
current activity:

(1) inspired
(2) discouraged
(3) energetic
(4) overwhelmed
(5) confident
(6) bored

This little check-in helps me to refocus and become present. I put the card into my drawer after I complete it. I plan on looking through them at the end of the week to look for any big patterns (e.g., wow, it seems that regardless of the activity, I always feel bored at 4:30 pm… or regardless of the time, I always feel inspired when focused on a writing activity). Even if the cards remain in my drawer forever without any “analysis,” I really value the activity as a way to regain a sense of mindfulness throughout the day.

… endnote …

I wrote this post and was going to separate it into two separate posts, expanding on the first part (learning as you go and blogging) separately from the second part (the itty bitty check-in list). However, I decided to let go and share the thoughts in a less polished format. It’s hard for me to do and the little perfectionist voice inside my head is not happy with me; but oh well, learning as we go, right?

… end endnote …

If you’re interested in working with me to learn innovative ways (creative tricks and techniques with a touch of idea genie dust!) to live a life you love, and truly walk the talk, email me directly to discuss personalized options. Email: carolyn (at) abeautifulrippleeffect (dot) com.

[image: laurageorge]

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Go ahead, try it. Write these words down. You may have a sudden urge to write them over and over again, I did, and now I am looking at a piece of paper that reads “rest and relaxation” about 50 times in a multitude of colors and handwriting styles. This piece of paper filled over the course of only a few days. Now, I look at it and like a dancer, a muscle memory is created. The mere act of intentionally glancing at the words triggers a cascading stillness response in my being.

My brain interrupts my focus with the sudden thought: It’s too simple, too easy. We dish out so much money and energy to create a sense of relief in our lives; however, could the solution we seek be missed because it can’t be simply “found”? It has to be “created” with precise intention and just one moment at a time.

Invite this calm energy into your life. Allow honesty and new truths to unfold from within this new space. Through this stillness, you create a clearing for your mind and body to align and establish a sense of inner harmony.

An Invitation to Rest

You are formally invited to rest for a full five minutes.

For guidance, I recommend watching a great video on Intentional Resting – How to Rest NOW. It is a free five- minute video available on www.intentionalresting.com.

For those experienced with resting (isn’t that a funny thing to hear someone say!?), do accept the invitation to rest by embracing these five minutes wholeheartedly.

Now, it’s time to rest!

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I recently purchased a fabulous e-book on establishing more balance/a sense of calm within our lives. It is filled with tips that you can utilize immediately as well as exercises/worksheets. The e-book is written by blogger Ali Hale and is called Regain Your Balance.

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We aren’t machines. After participating in so many activities, we feel drained, emotionally flattened and stuck. Yet, we seldom stop to allow our bodies to replenish our energy. Too often, time dictates our breaks, not our body. We are conditioned to think that when more needs to be done, we must increase the amount of time spent working and decrease the amount of time spent refueling. This thinking causes a strange sense of obligation to sacrifice our wellbeing due to the time crunch and demands of the situation.

While it may seem counterintuitive, during the most hectic of times, we actually need more time to recharge.

We have a primal need for pleasure and recreation—but, as humans with free will, we can choose to ignore this need, to overcome our instincts and go against nature. We convince ourselves that there is no limit to how far we can push ourselves, that just as science produces better, faster, more reliable and steady machines, we too can hone our abilities through modifying our nature. Many of us attempt to train ourselves to need less down time—to sleep less, to rest less, to cease less—to do more and stretch beyond our limits. But, like it or not, there is a limit, and if we continue to violate nature’s demands, to abuse ourselves, we will pay the price—individually and as a society. –Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., Even Happier

In any area of your life, in order to recharge and get motivated, it’s important to give yourself permission to pause. These pauses provide you with the time and space needed to redirect your focus and energy. Over time, I’ve learned to take breaks and focus my attention on mini-activities that quiet my judgmental left-brain and ignite my inner passion. After these little timeouts, I usually discover that my productivity actually increases, as does the quality of my work.

A few activities in which I recently indulged:

Cleaning my office. Did I really need to re-organize all of my files last week? No. The files themselves could wait, but the act of organizing allows me to cleanse and recharge my mental energy. When I was done, I had the energy needed to get more done.

Creating a collage. I also didn’t need to make a collage, but the process of making art allows me to turn off part of my brain so that it can rejuvenate.

Writing in my journal. A couple of years ago, I started keeping a journal. It’s such a release for me at the end of the day to write, doodle, or tape photos to the pages.

In addition to taking breaks, it’s important to notice how you talk to yourself. Are you focusing more on what you don’t want to happen or what you DO want to happen? Do you ever say to yourself, “I am not going to procrastinate”? You probably have a laundry list of things that you don’t want to do. This list is draining your energy from what you want to be doing.

Pause and think about what you want to do. What do you want to work on today? Of course, you may not “want” to do everything that is on your plate; however, you do want to get it off of your plate, which will only happen if you take action. The key is to emphasize moving forward and to use language that supports your goals. You want to be your biggest cheerleader.

The Take-Home Message:

You are in control. Recognize when you feel drained and when you lack motivation. Rather than punishing yourself or focusing on what you should be doing, reconnect with your inner compass and determine what you want to do. Then, let the energy restoration begin!

When you are busy, what do you do to recharge? Leave a comment!

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-> I am busy, busy, busy pulling together the final details for a new service that I will be launching online SOON! This new service is focused on helping you discover innovative ways to create big changes in your life.  Sign up here for my advance notice list.

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Life is suffering. No one can make less of it. Pain finds us without fail. Hearts break; dreams die; hatred flourishes; sickness prevails; people and promises leave without a trace. I dare not trivialize. I only dare to turn toward the glimmer and let it lift me into a moment’s radiant grace. This is the turn we have to take, over and over, to make our way home, to reach the untrammeled peace, the pure marvel, of an ordinary life. We must finally see that the light we seek streams from our very own eyes and always has. -Karen Maezen Miller, Hand Wash Cold

In the middle of the night, my mind and my body become still. I observe my thoughts without judgment, as they pass through my consciousness. I recognize their presence and then let them go. I feel a sense of clarity that often is distant during the day.

During the dark silence at night, I don’t avoid my thoughts by working on tasks or focusing my attention elsewhere.  Typically, during the day, I exist within a state of constant doing. At night, I am simply being.

Avoiding our thoughts is a form of thought procrastination, not thought dissolution. As such, our thoughts await our attention rather than disappearing. I learned this truth the hard way – enduring lots of sleepless nights. Our thoughts and feelings, especially the negative ones, can be powerful tools for helping us discover a different perspective and positive alternatives. You can utilize these tools whenever you want – preferably, before you have too many sleepless nights.

The key to unraveling your negative thoughts is simple. Acknowledge those thoughts — know what they are, what is. Byron Katie created four questions to help center one within the rational mindset of clearly investigating our thoughts.  Katie’s method is called “The Work,” and it has become wildly successful across the world.

Byron Katie writes the following about thoughts in her book, Loving What Is:

“Most people think that they are what their thoughts tell them they are…. Thoughts just appear. They come out of nothing and go back to nothing, like clouds moving across the empty sky. They come to pass, not to stay. There is no harm in them until we attach to them as if they were true.

No one has ever been able to control his thinking, although people may tell the story of how they have. I don’t let go of my thoughts – I meet them with understanding. Then they let go of me.

Thoughts are like the breeze or the leaves on the trees or the raindrops falling. They appear like that, and through inquiry we can make friends with them. Would you argue with a raindrop? Raindrops aren’t personal, and neither are thoughts. Once a painful concept is met with understanding, the next time it appears you may find it interesting. The next time it appears, you may find it funny. The next time, you may not even notice it. This is the power of loving what is.”

Four Questions – The Work of Byron Katie

Use the following four questions with the concept that you are investigating. When answering the questions, close your eyes, be still, and go deeply within as you contemplate each one. Inquiry stops working the moment you stop answering the questions.

Instructions: Write down your judgments about any stressful situation in your life, past present, or future. Then investigate the first statement about these judgments using the questions below. One by one, analyze each statement with the four questions below.

1. Is it true?
2. Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without the thought?

Now, turn the thought around.

To do the turnaround, rewrite your statement. First, write it as if it were written about you. Where you have written someone’s name, put yourself. Instead of “he” or “she”, put “I.” For example, “Paul doesn’t appreciate me” turns around to “I don’t appreciate Paul” and “I don’t appreciate myself.” Another type is a 180-degree turnaround to the extreme opposite: “Paul does appreciate me.”

• Give at least three specific, genuine examples of how the turnaround is true in your life.
• Can you find other turnarounds?
• Give specific, genuine examples for each turnaround.

This exercise is not about blaming yourself or feeling guilty. It’s about discovering alternatives in your thinking that can bring you peace.

The Work takes practice, but there is no “perfect” way to do it. The goal is feel relief and a sense of empowerment. Visit Byron Katie’s site for videos, downloads, and other free resources to help you practice this powerful method.

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-> On June 10th, I will be launching a new service to help you discover innovative ways to create big changes in your life. Sign up here to receive insider discounts, news, and freebies!

-> New Video: My Thoughts on Time Management

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