… image from studio mela …
Julie Green from UpUp Creative and Each Penny Pretty inspired this post with her comment on my last post, Learning to Let Go: One Life Altering Step at a Time. Julie writes:
I definitely know that feeling — that nagging in your brain. That part of you that asks, “What if no one likes it? What if this is a failure? What if this or that or some other bad thing happens?”
Sometimes I have to force myself to ask the counter questions: “What if everyone loves it? What if it’s a hit?” Sometimes my answers to those questions teach me the most.
In graduate school, we spend a lot of time reading research articles and analyzing pretty much everything. We analyze big issues as well as the intricate details of everyday life. With only three weeks until the end of my first year, it’s interesting to see how much my thinking has evolved over this period of time.
As researchers, our primary job is to think, which sounds pretty easy and fun. Yet, you become so good at thinking about everything at a microscopic level that it’s hard to shut off that type of “thinking.” For example, reading a simple newspaper article turns into a project. I assess and dig into the details of a story and am always skeptical of headlines. I find myself getting into an argument with a piece of paper! Okay, maybe not a real argument, but you get the point!
I think differently, which has its pros and cons. It is very easy to list the cons — for most people, in any situation, the cons are much more salient than the pros.
Therefore, it’s time to work harder on something that matters a lot: thinking, looking, talking, and hyping the bright side.
The bright side is what we live for, what we wish and hope for, where we see other people living their glorious lives. It’s everything we want, need, and love — the good stuff, the little stuff we often overlook.
The glorious thing is that this side already exists — we just need to get our perspective on board to realize. As we continue to grow and evolve as individuals and as a society, our focus needs to shift. We gravitate towards the dark side; we don’t admit this, but it’s evident almost everywhere we look. Deep down, I think we all crave this change. To wake up and hear about growth, rather than downfall. I am very ready for this change and take on the challenge of working to transform my perspective. And that doesn’t mean putting on a fake little smile regardless of how I feel. It simply means becoming mindful that I can choose how I look at a situation.
Sounds like a fantasy, but that’s okay. I have this Maya Angelou quote above my desk: “If one is lucky, a solitary fantasy can totally transform one million realities.”
Change occurs one individual at a time. It’s slow and takes plenty of effort and perseverance, but it is the epitome of a beautiful ripple effect.
• • •
Okay … I’m ready (are you?) …
On my desk: my planner (full of to-do lists) sitting next to a picture of my family in a frame with the phrase, “remember this moment,” engraved on it
–> Every time I look at that photo, my heart overflows with joy and love
My inbox: inbox zero (yes, there are many zeros in the total number of emails I have) — also in that inbox is an email from sister
–> I don’t care if I ever reach “inbox zero,” that one email outweighs them all
Auction: feeling heart broken by the lack of support from people I admired or feeling overwhelming gratitude for those individuals whose support is unwavering (and have given with their heart and soul)
–> I choose to focus on gratitude.
• • •
Oh my goodness, that was an incredibly empowering activity.
Let’s keep this going… choose to look on the bright side so we can continue this powerful change.
What to do: Make a Choice
Look at three scenarios and flip the coin.
Don’t ask why, ask when.
Dwell on the past or do something today.
Wishing for or going for.
I just want to be like him/her or I want to be like me (creating my own path with my own rules).
I don’t know what I’m doing or I’m doing.
I don’t want to fail or I will learn.
Make the decision to look on the bright side.
