Through January 15th, I will continue to post my personal responses to Reverb11. I hope you enjoy these more vulnerable posts and join in with your thoughts and own reflections. You can also expect to see some more “regular” posts mixed in as well!
21. Space. Where do you feel most safe, most free to be yourself—where you let down your guard?
When thinking about where I feel most safe, I began by writing down the words/feelings/emotions that I automatically associate with “safe.” Below is my unedited list.
safe = freedom, quiet, calm, recognize my locus of control, personal expectations > extrinsic expectations, structure, confidence, creating my own formula, letting whatever happens be enough, doing the work, following sparks of inspiration, trusting my inner voice—confident in my intuition, entering and exiting with intention—setting up safe rituals to help me do this, less rigid and more exploratory, showing up for myself before anyone else.
I feel most safe in one particular physical space, my creative cave—my office. And this space is powerful for me. Its held me in times of intense vulnerability. I trust this space and its seemingly magical powers to bring me back to a place of security regardless of what may be happening beyond its walls. It has become a security blanket, a place I retreat to knowing that I will let down my guard.
But I’m losing this space. I will be moving at the end of February and realize that losing this space is making this transition even more difficult.
Between now and mid March, my life will be full of travel, packing, uncertainty, and chaos. All activities that fuel me with great energy and calmness (NOT!).
My focus is turning to how I can create this space for myself—a space that is flexible and not dependent on my location.
I’ve been traveling for the past two weeks and without realizing it, I have already begun to challenge my old patterns and dependence on my physical space by continuing to blog (actually blogging more than even when I’m in my normal space/routine). I didn’t plan on doing this, but it has allowed me to see (and have actual evidence) that everything won’t fall apart without the anchor of my safe space.
Have you ever had similar fears when making a big move? Any suggestions on creating a more flexible safe space while I’m in transition mode for the next couple of months?
